Spare us this lovefest
Senior Pakistani leaders are rushing to embrace India, but we have a few demands first.india Updated: May 08, 2012 23:25 IST
Pakistan's obsession with India will not go away in a hurry, it would seem. And our neighbour is subject to severe mood swings. From accusing India of trying to break it up to inviting India to dance the tango with it, Pakistan seems to have become a subcontinental stalker where we are concerned. First we have President Asif Zardari asking Manmoh-an Singh to demilitarise the Siachen, then we have Prime Minister Yousaf Raza Gilani calling for a new era in economic collaboration and old Nawaz Sharif crawling out of the woodwork and asking Pakistan to unilaterally abolish the visa regime with India.
Well, well, well, what a turn up for the books. And we wonder what next, Hafiz Saeed asking for unilateral terror rights? India asking for access to the Lahori galauti kebab recipe? We wonder if this new flurry of activity is a case of being on the rebound after the US has turned a bit cool to Pakistan's advances. Now that would be a cynical thought. But, the thing to do is to come up with a wishlist of our own. We could ask for tourist visas for package tours to the madrasas and jihadi camps in Pakistan to learn first hand how to assemble a Kalashnikov in 40 seconds. Then we could ask for tours of all the places that Osama bin Laden lived in and we gather there were quite a few at last count. A swing around the salubrious surroundings in which minorities live in Pakistan would add greatly to our understanding of our beloved neighbour.
We are sure that we will be welcomed with open arms, and other arms. Pakistan is indeed a most receptive country given its unparalleled hospitality to all manners of freedom fighters striving with great might to liberate Kashmir and knock over a few landmarks in India. But first things first. Pakistan should kickstart this new era of friendship with a nice garden party where it should invite the gentle Hafiz Saeed who could enlighten us on his unique methods of deepening this relationship.