What are the things in life that you absolutely could not do without? Has the list always been the same, or does it change with the passage of time? Speaking for myself, the list has changed through every phase of my life. For instance, ever since I began earning my keep, I would get my hair washed and styled professionally at least twice a week. It didn’t matter where in the world I was, what the pressures on my time were, and how much it cost. I simply had to get my hair done professionally. It was the one non-negotiable that was just not up for discussion.
Then came the Covid pandemic, and we were all trapped in our homes for months and months with no prospect of a visit to a hairdresser. So, I had no choice but to suck it up, and shampoo and blow-dry my hair myself. Initially, it was a bit of a chore (not to mention, a total bore). But after I steeled myself to buy an Airwrap, I began blow-drying my own hair, and in a matter of weeks I managed to achieve better results than I ever got in the salon. Since then, I have never looked back. The only time I visit the hair dresser now is to get my hair coloured. Other than that, my hairstyling is down to me. My new non-negotiable is that my Airwrap always travels with me, even though it takes up entirely too much space in my suitcase.
That’s the thing about non-negotiables. They may remain constant or they may keep changing with each phase of your life.
{{/usCountry}}That’s the thing about non-negotiables. They may remain constant or they may keep changing with each phase of your life.
{{/usCountry}}For instance, there was a time in my life when going to the gym was non-negotiable. No matter how late I finished work, I would stop by the gym to run on the treadmill and do weights for an hour or so. As I grew older and my OCD became worse, I found it hard to share a space with people who liberally left sweat stains on every machine. So, my new non-negotiable is 20 minutes on the cross trainer I have installed at home, and a quick turn with free weights every evening as I watch TV.
Sleep was the other non-negotiable I simply couldn’t do without in my younger days. If I didn’t get my eight hours, the rest of my day would be wrecked. I couldn’t think. I couldn’t read. And I certainly couldn’t write. I simply had to write that day off and hope a good night’s sleep would remedy the situation on the morrow. As I grow older, I find that my sleep requirements have changed considerably. Even five hours are enough to get by on, and I am not destroyed by having to wake up early to take a morning flight, for instance.
What are the current non-negotiables of my life? Well, I do have a rather long list: three cups of black coffee every morning; getting out of the house every day, even if it’s just for a walk; reading for an hour before bed… As to how many will survive into the next decade, your guess is as good as mine.
From HT Brunch, September 5, 2026
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