Listen, let’s talk | Hindustan Times
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Listen, let’s talk

If you want to stay “happily ever after”, have a dialogue, says Chetna Joshi Bambroo.

sex and relationships Updated: Dec 27, 2008 17:23 IST
Chetna Joshi Bambroo

There’s so little time and a lot to talk. Except for our leaders, does your husband also understand this? Read on this article and if you identify yourself with any of these situations — Here’s a solution at the very beginning, which is — wherever you are, whoever you are — have a DIALOGUE.

“I had an arranged marriage and the only way we (the couple) could know each other better was through talking, talking and more talking,” says Shweta Joshi, 29. She says that initially when she and her hubby were together, their friends used to say — ‘It seems both of you have a verbal diarrhoea, but the mitigating part is — it’s there when two of you are a company’.“But I don’t know what happened over the years. When there’s some problem between us, my hubby never tries to talk it out. I think the only way we can sort things out is by having a word, which has now become a task,” rues Shweta.

Well, wouldn’t it add to world peace if our respective partners talk — and sort the problem? “Certainly,” says Anju Mahajan, a business woman, adding, “I fail to understand why men don’t want to talk when there’s a problem. Once I suspected that my hubby is seeing someone. Fortunately it wasn’t true, but initially when I confronted my husband, he didn’t utter a word making my assumption grow stronger. Had he told me everything then, things wouldn’t have gone out of control. We didn’t speak for days — with my anxiety mounting with every call he answered. We were on the verge of getting divorced, when he finally “talked”.

Manav Diwan, a financial agency owner says, “I accept that we men try to escape from a situation where there is even a slightest hint of a discord, friction or tension in a relationship.” He adds, “It’s true that no matter how much we try our “ego” comes in between.”

Puneet Malik, a banker’s confession may sound a little unpardonable but it’s true. He says, “I find the whole process of ‘bringing up the bygones’ and discussing them very time consuming and boring. I always want things between my girl and I to ease out, but I want my silence to work more than my words.” Malik, like many other guys, knows that the solution is a dialogue, but the thought of sitting and talking things out gives him nightmares. “Though I know I would have to say million more words later to sort things out, but initially I do try to evade the topic,” confesses Malik.

And here comes the closing remark. Hotel owner Nishant Nag and his wife Monika say, “After all these years of experience and wisdom we gained from numerous sources, we have realised that little things also work on the same fundamentals as big things do — DIALOGUE.”

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