Usually this time of the year, CS Santosh would either be in the northern or southern shores of the Mediterranean, preparing for his annual pilgrimage—the Dakar. But the world of India’s ace rally pilot turned upside down in January when he suffered a life-threatening, high-speed crash during the annual competition in Saudi Arabia which forced doctors to put Santosh in an artificial coma.
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The accident left him with a dislocated shoulder and a severe concussion that resulted in memory loss,
Usually this time of the year, CS Santosh would either be in the northern or southern shores of the Mediterranean, preparing for his annual pilgrimage—the Dakar. But the world of India’s ace rally pilot turned upside down in January when he suffered a life-threatening, high-speed crash during the annual competition in Saudi Arabia which forced doctors to put Santosh in an artificial coma.
The accident left him with a dislocated shoulder and a severe concussion that resulted in memory loss, loss of basic motor skills, vision problems and depression.
The 38-year-old has come a long way since. Almost a year of dedicated therapy means that he now lives a near-normal life. And he will be back at the Dakar this year, though not as a rider.
The 2022 edition, which begins on January 1, would have been Santosh’s eighth consecutive race if he were fit, but it's been only three months since he started riding his bike regularly and he's a long way off from racing again.
“The whole motivation to being better was the Dakar but I have made peace with that (not being able to participate)," Santosh said. "At least I am happy to have a life. This year I follow the Dakar like a fan. I want to give the fans a preview of what actually happens in the Dakar but through the lens. I will be creating social media content for my team Hero MotoSports.
Not competing does not mean that a return to his favourite race comes without difficulties.
“I am just a little anxious that I have to meet all these riders who I've known for years," Santosh said. "The whole depression thing is that you can get overly anxious for no apparent reason. Anxiousness comes with being depressed as well. I am trying to get over that too. Doesn’t make sense but it is what it is.
Part of the anxiety comes from the precarious feeling of having memory lapses.
“The things that I have forgotten are just forgotten. I have to move forward and can’t hold myself to that point, guilty for that," Santosh said. "I just need to make new memories. At least my brain is working, all my reflexes, coordination are coming back.”
For the first time since his accident, Santosh also had an emotional reunion with his Hero MotoSports team in November at the Abu Dhabi Desert Challenge.
“For the first time I saw them as people, as human beings," he said. "I always saw them as mechanics, suspension or engine guy, team professionals I engaged with. I have never experienced love like this before."
For Santosh now, every step, every new activity or challenge is loaded with heightened significance, even if it is making videos for social media.
“I need to do it because my team is also kind of worried because it is not a normal injury. If I break some bones, they will be like whenever I am ready, I can ride. But the fact that I messed up my head...I have to win their confidence because they have to second guess everything because it is the CPU at the end of the day and not some broken bones,” he said.
In October, as his motor skills and vision improved to a point where he could get back on the bike again, Santosh has been taking his Hero Xpulse out to Big Rock Dirt Park, his own off-road facility near Kolar in Karnataka.
“I am comfortable riding a motorcycle except that one nerve in my left hand is not working completely. I can’t move my wrist and fingers beyond a certain degree. I can’t use the clutch properly. In some wrist positions, I don’t have the strength at all,” said Santosh, who in 2015 became the first Indian to compete and complete the celebrated Dakar Rally. “The doctors said that in three months I should be okay."
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