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Maid, off honour: Do you treat domestic help with equality?
A post shared by actor Sumona Chakravarti on treatment meted out to house helps has irked many, who have condemned the lack of basic courtesy.
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Domestic helps and nannies are the lifeline of our households yet many a times aren’t treated with that kind of respect. Recently, actor Sumona Chakravarti shared a post about her experience at the airport where a help stood beside a family enjoying a meal at the restaurant. They didn’t bother to offer her food, and didn’t even let her sit! And such disturbing sights,Delhiites claim, are quite common in the city.
“I remember, a few weeks back, I had gone out for dinner to a restaurant in a mall. There was a big family there, and they had brought their maid along to take care of their baby. While the baby was sleeping in the stroller, the maid was given a chair a little away from the table and made to sit there. The stroller was also parked right next to her. I just cannot understand why she couldn’t join the family at the table,” rues Manisha Verma, a teacher from Malviya Nagar.
Sharing a similar experience, Nikita Parmar, a homemaker from Vasant Kunj, adds: “We were at a fine dining restaurant in south Delhi a few days back, where I saw a family make their help sit at a different table, while they enjoyed their meal elsewhere. It was very clear that the family wasn’t comfortable with their help sitting along with them. I feel this is so unfair! It enraged me so much, but what do you do with such people... If you can’t treat them well, then better not take them along with you.”
Some have gone to the extent of taking a stand against this kind of mistreatment, but to no avail. Ishita Bhatt, an environment consultant from Gurugram, recalls, “A month back I saw a lady yelling badly on her help at an indoor kids’ playing area in Gurugram because the kid got hurt while playing. She was scolding her so badly and was so loud that almost everyone present there was feeling bad for the help. I understand that the kid got hurt, but the mother was also present at the time of the child getting hurt, then the responsibility lies with her too. I didn’t know that woman personally, and initially was a little sceptical to interfere in the matter, but her inhuman behaviour towards her help forced me to intervene... I tried to explain her that it was just an accident and the kid was fortunately fine with a little bruises that would get healed in a few days, but she refused to calm down.”
However, there are exceptions. Priyanka Seth, a businesswoman from Gurugram says for her help is like her family member. “We are a couple with two kids. My full time help is the fifth member of our family. She travels with us and goes on all the outings in the same manner as we do. She uses those opportunities to learn and grow. For example, she started her flying experience with us. Every time we go to the airport, she’d ask me about it, understanding the process and all. Eventually she gained enough confidence that she recently decided to fly to Kolkata (nearest city to her village) to visit her parents,” says Seth, and Heena Gandhi, a homemaker from Paschim Vihar, chips in, “We recently went to a mall close to our place and at the restaurants there, we saw tables that had families sitting with their helps. Everyone was eating the same meal. I feel this is the minimum that a family can do for someone who is working for them!”
Dr Anjana Singhla, a general physician from Saket, opines that at times, onlookers tend to get a bit judgmental. “Sometimes people make arrangements to ensure that the kids are taken care of and there is someone available with them at all times. For instance, they take turns with the help to have food — like I always offer food to my kids’ nanny first and while she is eating, I take care of the kids. Once the nanny is done, she plays with the kids and the I eat my meal in peace. And I think this is a great arrangement. Then again, onlookers might not understand and may jump to judgements. Like this once, a lovely lady told me to not ‘mistreat’ the nanny by not offering food. When I explained to her that the nanny has already eaten, that woman gave me a hug,” she shares.
Author tweets @anjuri
