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Don?t lose your today

The effort to keep up with the rest of the world takes its toll on our emotional equilibrium and health.

health and fitness Updated: Mar 26, 2004 18:47 IST

The effort to keep up with the rest of the world takes its toll on our emotional equilibrium. The things that trouble us are endless: parenting, work overload, and even the traffic mayhem. We become irritable, apprehensive and angry. By the end of the day, many of us become emotional wrecks who don’t seem to have much to look forward to.

Our mind constantly motivates us to outdo others, consistently rewinding back to the past or planning a marathon ahead. In the rat race, we forget the need to be here and now. We need to direct our energies to what we have rather than what we don’t. You have to live in the moment to seek pleasure.

Comedian Milton Berle made a lot of sense when he said, “If opportunity doesn’t knock, build a door.” We can create an aura around us to promote positive conditioning of our mind. A strong emotional base can help us manage problems as they come up and get us back on our feet after some initial hiccups. To achieve emotional stability, some things to keep in mind are:

* The past is dead and cannot be revived, and the future is uncertain. Living in past and the future is an illusion. Live in the present.

* We invariably expect love, admiration and respect from others. This is not always possible as we have no control over other people’s feelings. Learn to love yourself and not judge people according to their attitude to you.

* We gladly accept successes but not failures. This is unrealistic as competence is achieved after making some mistakes. Everyone makes mistakes. Learn to forgive yourself and move on.

* Don’t blame others for your failures and misfortune. Usually, our own negative attitudes makes us view neutral events negatively. There is a possibility that someone else might find something positive in what we see as a problem

* Often, we do not appreciate other people’s objectives, priorities or programmes and expect things to always happen our way. Learn to accommodate other opinions.

* We sometimes believe that a bad experience in the past can control what happens in future. Get rid of this negativity.

* Don’t be dependent on luck or divine grace without putting in your best effort. Anxiety sets in, the moment our luck fails us. Miracles happen to the deserving.

(The writer is a corporate trainer)

First Published: Mar 26, 2004 18:47 IST