They say that true happiness lies within each of us. And it is up to us to access it with our own efforts. So, we shouldn’t depend on other people to make us happy; instead, we should dig deep to access our own happiness. Well, over the years, I have discovered that the same is true of peace. You cannot depend on the people around you to preserve your peace; you have to safeguard it yourself.
And, as I grow older, I find that I treasure peace over happiness. Or perhaps it is more accurate to say that peace and happiness have converged into one emotion in my life. I am only truly happy when I am at peace with the world and myself. And I am only truly peaceful when I am happy with the world and myself.
So, my priority these days is to safeguard my peace so that I can be happy (and vice versa). And these are just some of the ways in which I endeavour to do so:
· There is a cartoon I saw a few years ago that left quite an impression on me. A woman wakes up at 3 am to see her husband typing furiously on the computer. What’s wrong?, she asks. Nothing’s wrong, he says, it’s just that somebody is being wrong on the Internet…Well, I laughed at that, but it also made me pause and promise myself that I would never be that man ever again. People can be wrong on the Internet for as long as they want. I won’t be logging in to correct them ever. Being peaceful, I have decided, is more important than being correct.
· What’s true of the Internet is true of real life as well. I no longer get into arguments with friends and family about anything from politics to religion to which is the best way to cook a biryani. The way I look at it, anyone else’s opinion on anything is none of my business. They are welcome to look at the world on their own terms; and I will content myself with looking at the world from my own unique perspective. And who is to say that either of us is wrong or right? It’s all a matter of perspective, right?
{{/usCountry}}· What’s true of the Internet is true of real life as well. I no longer get into arguments with friends and family about anything from politics to religion to which is the best way to cook a biryani. The way I look at it, anyone else’s opinion on anything is none of my business. They are welcome to look at the world on their own terms; and I will content myself with looking at the world from my own unique perspective. And who is to say that either of us is wrong or right? It’s all a matter of perspective, right?
{{/usCountry}}· While conflict avoidance is all well and good, it is also important to excise negative people and negative energies from your life. If you find that a friend is constantly draining your energy with his negativity, then the hard truth is that you would be better off without that person in your life. If a family member is bringing you down with constant criticism and carping, then you would benefit from going no-contact for a while. People pleasing should not come at the cost of your own mental health.
· Last of all, don’t ever forget the power of a simple ‘no’ when it comes to preserving your peace. The day you refuse to let social pressure force you into saying yes when you mean no, is the day that you finally attain peace. And, as I have discovered, with true peace comes true happiness.