Humans are social animals, and it is important for us to build connections and make friends for both work and play. However, it is not as easy for some people to do so as it is for others. For some, the idea of going out on their own and making friends is a terrifying concept.
Also Read | Worried about your mental health? Therapist Jeffrey Meltzer shares 4 activities that can help
Taking to Instagram on September 6, Florida-based therapist Jeffrey Meltzer shared five ways that can help one find their people. They are presented as follows.
1. Look for people who validate your emotions
Looking for people who validate our emotions does not mean that we get someone who agrees with everything we say. Rather, it means that they make an effort to understand what we are feeling instead of immediately minimising it or trying to fix it.
{{/usCountry}}Looking for people who validate our emotions does not mean that we get someone who agrees with everything we say. Rather, it means that they make an effort to understand what we are feeling instead of immediately minimising it or trying to fix it.
{{/usCountry}}“Around people like this, you're more likely to feel safe being honest about what is actually going on,” noted Jeffrey.
2. Look for people who challenge you in healthy ways
According to the therapist, the best relationship should not keep an individual exactly where they are.
“The right people encourage you to pursue the things that matter to you and support you when growth requires stepping outside of your comfort zone,” he shared. “Being around them can make it easier to become more of the person that you want to be.”
3. Pay attention to who celebrates your wins
In the words of the therapist, “The way someone responds when you share good news can tell you a lot about the relationship. Your people aren't only available when something goes wrong. When something good happens to you, they can be genuinely happy for you without making it about themselves.”
Having such people in our lives makes it easier to share the good parts of our lives with them as well.
4. Look for reciprocity
While there is no need to keep score in a healthy friendship, Jeffrey pointed out that a relationship should not depend on one person doing all of the work.
“Both people make an effort to reach out and make time for one another. Over time, you should be able to feel that maintaining the relationship matters to both of you,” he noted.
5. Notice who makes you feel like you matter
As Jeffrey stated, “Your people are genuinely curious about your life. They remember the things that you've shared with them. And when you spend time together, you don't constantly have to wonder whether they actually care about having you around. In other words, they make you feel like your presence matters.”
Note to readers: This article is for informational purposes only and not a substitute for professional medical advice. This report is based on user-generated content from social media. HT.com has not independently verified the claims and does not endorse them.
Jeffrey Meltzer is a Licensed Mental Health Counselor based in Florida. He graduated with a Master's in Mental Health Counselling from the University of South Florida and has been providing therapy services for over seven years.
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