Malavika’s Mumbaistan: A Tale of Three Cities

Mumbai, Delhi, Kolkata — three cities that glitter like a tiara across India’s forehead; each equally eulogised, criticised, glorified and vilified. Each city singularly different, unabashedly divergent and a world unto itself. But beyond their stereotyping and mythology, behind their facades and fences, what are they really like?

Mumbai, Delhi, Kolkata — three cities that glitter like a tiara across India’s forehead; each equally eulogised, criticised, glorified and vilified. Each city singularly different, unabashedly divergent and a world unto itself.

Mumbai, Delhi and Kolkata — one, celebrated as the country’s business and film capital; another, the seat of its administration and political power; and the third, a repository of its intellectual and cultural ethos. (Illustration: Gajanan Nirphale)

One, celebrated as the country’s business and film capital; another, the seat of its administration and political power; and the third, a repository of its intellectual and cultural ethos.

But beyond their stereotyping and mythology, behind their facades and fences, what are they really like?

Surely, there’s no better way to get under the skin of a city than to dine as a guest in one of its celebrated homes. For it is only here, ensconced within the four walls of your host’s private residence, that you are afforded a peek into their city’s heart and can get a measure of its manners and modes, its customs and canons, what makes it tick and what gets its goat.

“The first question you get asked by people you’ve just been introduced to at a Delhi dinner is: Where do you live?” says a long-time resident of the Capital. “In Delhi, location is everything. A Delhiwala can gauge what work you do and how much you’re worth in two seconds flat — just by knowing where you live. On the other hand, in Kolkata, the first questions I’m asked are usually to find out which authors and filmmakers I admire and which political ideology I adhere to…”

And what about Mumbai, I prompt the long-time Capital resident, what are the first questions you get asked here?

“In Mumbai, no one really bothers about where you live or what books you read — all they want to know is what you do,” she guffaws.

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“Even the art on the walls of each of these cities is so very different,” says a young corporate honcho, whose work takes him frequently to all three cities. “In Delhi, it is wall-to-wall Hussains and humongous works by Subodh Gupta and Ravindra Reddy — after all they have the space for them. In Mumbai, you’re more likely to see the ‘progressives’ on the walls like Raza and Souza, while older collectors display their Shiavax Chawdas and Aras with pride. And of course, the grand old homes in Kolkata feature works primarily by the Bengali masters and Ganesh Pyne,” he says, adding, “But that’s not all, even what you see on the bookshelves is so very different in all three places.”

How so?

“Well, firstly in Delhi, there are two kinds of people,” says the corporate honcho, “Those who display handsome, leather-bound collections of volumes, which you know have never been opened even once; then there are the other homes — mostly in Lutyen’s Delhi — where you will almost certainly see well-thumbed copies of William Dalrymple’s City of Djinns, Tharoor’s The Great Indian Novel and Jawaharlal Nehru: A Biography by Frank Moraes.”

And Mumbai?

“In Mumbai, you’re more likely to encounter copies of Shantaram, Sacred Games, Maximum City and A Brief History of Time. Meanwhile in Kolkata, as to be expected, Tagore’s collected works take pride of place, along with books by Amit Chaudhuri, Amitav Ghosh and Siddhartha Mukherjee…”

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But of course, it’s not only what’s on the walls and shelves that tell the tales of these three cities and their individual traits, but also what transpires over the course of the evening: What is spoken about and is not can convey so much about a city’s ethos.

As to be expected, here too there are striking differences. A media maven, who finds himself in one or the other of these three every four months or so, says he follows simple ground rules: “I never begin a conversation about politics in Delhi, if I don’t have lots of time. In Mumbai, I avoid talking about business or the stock exchange if I’m party-hopping; and in Kolkata, I never enter a discussion about football or Mamata Banerjee, if I want a peaceful evening ahead.”

Ah yes, what about the sensitivities in each city, I ask the media maven: What does an outsider have to remember never to say at dinner?

“That’s simple,” he replies, “The rule of thumb in Delhi is don’t criticise the ruling regime — unless you’re among really close friends. In Mumbai, it’s best not to criticise Sachin Tendulkar or Lata Mangeshkar; and in Kolkata, you’d be better off not saying a word against Sourav Ganguly and Satyajit Ray.”

And what do people like to show off about over dinner in these three cities, I ask the media maven.

“I guess in Delhi, it’s about owning a farmhouse, or a politician; in Kolkata, people take great pride in telling you about their priceless collections of shawls, or first editions of Tagore’s Gitanjali; and in Mumbai, it’s all about owning a boat and a getaway home in Alibag — though these days, among the younger lot, it’s also about their latest three-star Michelin experience,” he says.

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Which brings us to the most important part of at-home dining — the food on the table and the drinks on offer. “It’s still scotch, preferably Johnny Walker Blue Label, with kebabs, butter chicken tandoori naan and kali daal, in Delhi — unless Ritu Dalmia is catering,” says the long-time Capital resident. “In Mumbai, it could be anything from finger foods like Japanese sushi to Gujarati sev puri and khandvi, to a tossed green salad and a charcuterie and cheese board, accompanied by a choice of new-world wines and Bloody Mary or Margaritas. In Kolkata, the table will groan with homemade Bengali specialties like machher jhol, hilsa curry and often a platter of the city’s famous Nizam’s rolls, Arsalan’s biryani or Chinese dishes from Tangra.”

What about dress codes, how seriously should one take them, we ask the Delhi resident.

“That’s particularly revealing,” she says, “In Delhi, smart casual could mean either showing up in a Modi jacket or in heavy-duty designer brands like Gucci-Pucci and Dior. In Mumbai, generally it’s casual chic and anything goes — jeans, capris, Hawaiian shirts, flip flops or even Kohlapuri chappals. Of course, in Kolkata, a crisp dhoti-kurta with a perfectly crimpled hand finish is de rigueur…”

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Anything else you can tell us about these cities, we ask our three friends who appear to be so well versed in their ways.

“Yes. What time you arrive for the dinner says a lot about you in Delhi,” says the corporate honcho. “In Delhi, an 8.30pm invitation means that your main guest will show up three hours later, mumbling ‘sorry, ministerji called’,” he smiles.

“In Mumbai, it seems to be all about being fashionably late,” says the Capital’s long-time resident, adding, “Here, the words Midnight’s Children take on a new meaning, as no self-respecting guest arrives before 10.30pm and the dinner goes on till the wee hours.”

“Try coming even half-an-hour late in Kolkata and you’re sure to receive a frosty look from your hosts and what’s worse — find the ilish curry almost finished,” says the media maven. “Also, you might never get invited again.”

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So, there you have it, gentle reader: The ins and outs of at-home dining in Delhi, Mumbai and Kolkata, from people in the know.

As we said at the very beginning, each city singularly different, unabashedly divergent and a world unto itself…