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The secrets of romance

Hold hands together in silence. You will learn gradually to communicate with each other telepathically.

india Updated: May 11, 2006 13:55 IST

Love is a blend of informality and courtesy. Between two people who love each other, courtesy, like a delicate waterfall, keeps the mountain pool of their love ever fresh.

Show respect for one another. For while feelings fluctuate, respect can remain a constant. Listen respectfully to your partner’s views when they differ from your own. Preserve a certain dignity in your relationship: that dignity which gives others freedom to be themselves.

Perform some little act daily to give happiness to your beloved: an act of service, perhaps; a small gift; a word of appreciation; a special smile of affection. Let not the happy stream of your love run dry for lack of replenishing rain.

Keep a sense of humour. Share together a sense of the absurd. At the same time, be careful how you tease each other. Never tease if the teasing is unappreciated. Let your humour be kindly, never sarcastic.

Never lose sight of the underlying reality of your love. Isn’t your long-term relationship more important than any passing disagreement? Flow with the rhythms of your love.

Avoid voicing negative emotions. Wait, rather, for calmness to return. When you are upset, you perceive few things with clarity. Calm your heart’s feelings: only in calmness can you perceive things as they really are.

Show appreciation when you feel it. Never take your beloved’s awareness of this sentiment for granted. Though the sentiment is as old as the human race, no matter how often you say with sincere feeling, “I love you,” your words will sound forever fresh, forever new.

Hold hands together in silence. You will learn gradually to communicate with each other telepathically.

Hold realistic expectations of one another. After all, imperfection is inherent in humanity. Concentrate on the qualities that drew you together, not on others that might force you apart.

Enjoy stillness together, for in stillness love attains perfection. Human love is a reflection of divine love. And God is perfect stillness.