Wife has lost sex drive
1. I am a 31-year-old guy. My wife is 25. We have been married for one and half year. It looks like my wife is no longer keen on having sex. Whenever I try to get close, she makes an excuse. It's not that she doesn't like me anymore. It has been 15 days now that we have had sex. Usually I am the one taking the initiative. What should I do now?
Capacity to have sex is declining
2. I am a 27-year-old bachelor. Earlier I used to have sex four times in two hours. But now my capacity has decreased. I am able to participate only once and the second time it takes me too long to erect. What could be the reason? Please let me know.
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My girl has fallen for my friend
1. I am in a relationship for over three years now and we (my girl and me) have had our share of differences that we never discussed. After a long communication gap, my girl informed me that her feelings for me have changed and that she likes some other guy. The tragedy is that man happens to be my friend! What should I do? Is it possible to re-ignite the warmth and love we shared once?
Reply From Dr. Prem Lata Chawla: Cultivated relationships have to be nurtured with honesty as any attempt at repairing them after the break only makes them more knotty. None of your explanations are going to be acceptable to the other party and in fact might cause more suspicions and bitterness. It is best to move on with your life.
No pleasure during intercourse
2. There is a major problem while I during sexual intercourse. My girlfriend tells me that during sexual intercourse she never feels any sensation. She can feel my body but no amount of pleasure is there during the act. Although when I play with her clitoris she goes crazy. Now I assume this is not the case in most woman so I know there must be something wrong. She has seen her doc and she says nothing is wrong. Also she does not have vaginismus. Please help, as our relation is approaching a dead end!
Reply From Dr. Prem Lata Chawla: Men discussing sexual experience with their partner expect and want to hear it is great, that she is enjoying it thoroughly, that she is crazy for him and he is great at love making etc. Anything contrary to this expected reply upsets them and brings them to a dead end and kills the current and subsequent relationships. It is a well-known fact that most women do not experience vaginal orgasms, although medical science has yet to figure out the why of it. You must not equate human female sexual experience and behaviour with that of human male. The difference is so obvious that males carry their sexuality up front while in case of females it somewhere deep down. Your girl friend seems to be real naïve so as to give you an honest appraisal of her sexual experience. She could have made a big show of multiple orgasms just to keep up the relationship if the very foundation of relationship is orgasm.
First Published: Nov 20, 2006 16:22 IST