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![Priyanka says the period [when she suffered six-back-to-back flops] gave her the desire to win, to be better than she was yesterday (@CibelleLevi)](https://images.hindustantimes.com/img/2021/03/14/550x309/014aedce-834b-11eb-a12f-8b2f13f9e637_1615701173753.jpg "Priyanka says the period [when she suffered six-back-to-back flops] gave her the desire to win, to be better than she was yesterday (@CibelleLevi)")
From Bareilly’s May Queen Ball in 1999 to Bollywood’s toast in Hollywood in 2021: Priyanka Chopra picks seven life lessons she learnt along the way
Poised, poignant and picture-perfect. That’s Priyanka Chopra on a quick Zoom call. She’s as graceful as the Miss India who was crowned Miss World in 2000, as prompt as the Alex Parrish, the role she played in Quantico (2015-18) and still as much a desi girl as she is one of the very few Indians to take her Miss World title literally.
Having conquered Bollywood, she’s climbing the ladder in Hollywood, dabbling in music and has now taken the narrative of her life story in her own hands with her memoir, Unfinished. But she’s had battles to fight along the way, she points out. Here are seven wars she’s won, with excerpts from her memoir.
Boards vs beauty queen
Priyanka’s brother Siddharth and her mother entered her in the Miss India contest after she returned to Bareilly, having attended boarding school and high school in the US, which she defines as an experience that made her independent. “When I won Bareilly’s May Queen Ball in May 1999, that ‘fake it till you make it’ confidence I had been projecting was somewhat transformed into the real thing,” she writes.
She missed her board exams for Miss India because, as young as she was then, she knew that the entertainment world was hers. “When I became Miss World eventually, and film offers started coming to me, I remember talking to my parents about this,” she explains. “My dad said, ‘I don’t want you to have a ‘what if’ in your life’. He said, ‘You’ve got to try it and if you’re terrible at it, come back to college and do something else.’”
Old wounds & Bollywood
The transition from ramp to reel wasn’t smooth. On the sets of Andaaz (2003), choreographer Raja Khan threw the mic down and told her to pack up for the day. “Just because you’re Miss World, don’t presume you can dance. Learn to do your job before you report for work!” he told her.
“The episode was the critical foundation of my career. It taught me the difference between being an amateur and a professional and how essential it is to be prepared,” Priyanka writes. “From that experience onward, I’ve been prepped assiduously before going on to any set.”
Writing a memoir is not as easy as it seems, says Priyanka ruefully over the call. “It was difficult because it opens up old wounds. And I strive for excellence. If I’m doing something, I’m not going to do it halfway,” she says.
In the book, she’s recounted one of her first meetings with a famous director-producer, who had been accused of sexual harassment. He told her to stand up and twirl and then, “He suggested I get a boob job, fix my jaw and add a little more cushioning to my butt if I wanted to be an actress,” she writes.
Setback to success
She also writes about the six back-to-back flops she suffered about five years into her acting career and how that still motivates her every day. “[That period gave me] the desire to win, to be better than I was yesterday, to have a sense of purpose, which is very important to me,” says Priyanka. “I wake up every morning looking for purpose. I’ve always looked at giving my best damn shot and then if it doesn’t work out, try something else. But I’m always willing to try and learn – crucial in a business like mine which is inconsistent and a constant hustle.” she points out.
Musical calling
This need for purpose was why she jumped at the opportunity to sing when Interscope Records got in touch with her after watching Bluffmaster (2005). It was the music industry, not Hollywood, that took her to America, she says in her book.
Priyanka had sung in school choirs before but that didn’t mean she wasn’t nervous.
“There’s always a huge sense of doubt when you do anything for the first time, which has predominantly been my whole career,” she says. “I don’t come from the film industry or a family that was ever in entertainment. I didn’t go to music or film school. I’ve taught everything to myself and built my career on my back alone.”
But the thing to remember, she adds, is to ask whether you’re going to stay doubtful and risk failing or put your right foot forward with confidence? “Over time, I learnt you can’t define success or failure. If you do your best, the failure cannot be blamed on you. In the entertainment business, a movie is not defined by a person. If I focus on being excellent in my job, then I have delivered,” she shares. “I’ve had many doors slammed on my face. But you can’t desire evolution without having the gumption to be able to take a risk.”
Hollywood low
When her music career didn’t take off, she decided to dip into Hollywood with Quantico. “I was 100 per cent nervous because in India I was doing films with amazing filmmakers. But I wanted to do different kinds of roles. I was craving growth and hitting a wall in my work,” she says.
Hollywood gave her a few more problems. “Not everyone was open to meeting a complete unknown, no matter what her credentials elsewhere... I was reminded daily that I had barely made it to the starting line here,” she writes.
Besides, her audition for the role of Alex Parrish was the first real audition she’d had to do in over a decade. “Doing four movies a year and then doing a TV show or work in America was a big risk. If Hollywood hadn’t worked out, I would have had my tail between my legs. Thankfully, it did,” she laughs gratefully.
“My career in America is still very small. I’m only in the nascent stages. I’ve spent five years here, of which three years I was doing a show. I’ve just about done my first leading role in a feature and my first dramatic role,” she says.
Lonely journey
With the highs come the lows. Priyanka’s father’s death and her solitary time when she moved to New York in 2016 were especially hurtful. “I was dealing with the pressure of having to establish myself professionally all over again. I’d worked so hard to build one career in the Hindi film industry, then another in the music industry. And then Hollywood. I was exhausted,” she writes.
How did she get out of that funk? “You have to know that when you’re going to go up, you’re going to go down, and vice-versa. There’s no consistency in life and that’s something that happens to all of us. So there’s hope either way. There’s optimism in knowing that and it keeps you grounded. Keeping a check on the bigger picture instead of being caught up in the moment of sorrow or joy is crucial,” she tells us.
Writer’s block
Priyanka wrote her memoir during the Covid-19 quarantine and hit writer’s block several times. She also realised she couldn’t exactly remember what happened!
“I had been so busy looking at the next thing that I never looked back. I had to reform my memories and talk to people, asking them, ‘acchha yeh hua tha’ (is this what happened)? I wrote down my milestones and built around them.”
It wasn’t till March-April 2020 that she put pen to paper and treated it like a journal. “Then it just rushed out of me, almost as if it was waiting to come out. Sometimes I would have thoughts so fast that I started recording voice notes and transcribing them,” she reveals.
She surprised herself by how deep she went into the book. “I had to pull things out of the book because yeh thoda zyada ho gaya (this is a bit much),” she laughs. But it also felt like the right time to get it all out. “As a woman, I’m more secure. I find solid ground beneath my feet and confidence in my ability to deliver my job. It’s taken me 20 years to reach that place but I finally got there. It just seemed like the right time to tell my story and take charge of my own agency.”
She writes: “What I witnessed (gender bias), and learned became an unshakable part of my foundation in forming a myriad of future choices. [It gave me] an unwavering dedication to being an advocate for children, especially girls who weren’t afforded the choices and opportunities that I had been... Privilege and responsibility go hand in hand.”
*A previous version of this story erroneously called the Bareilly’s May Queen Ball, the McQueen Ball.
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From HT Brunch, March 14, 2021
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