Call me by my name: Addressing the confusion and awkwardness around love and disability

About 200 people gathered to discuss how we can make conversations easier without either putting people with disabilities on a pedestal or rendering them completely invisible

The last time you spoke to a person with disability, did you reference their ‘bravery’ or the ‘problem’ they were bravely dealing with? Did you throw in a sympathetic smile, and ask about their ‘special sixth sense’?

(From left) Kartiki Patel, Nipun Malhotra, Virali Modi and Divyanshu Ganatra during the panel discussion at Godrej Culture Lab auditorium, Vikhroli, Mumbai on Friday. (Pratik Chorge/HT Photo)

Chances are you did… most people do, unfortunately. And at a panel discussion titled Freedom to be Flawed: Awkward Conversations Around Disability, held at the Godrej India Culture Labs in Vikhroli, the message was clear — they want you to stop.

The panelists included Divyanshu Ganatra, India’s first blind solo paraglider, Kartiki Patel, a wheelchair-bound national-level badminton and basketball player; Nipun Malhotra, who suffers from arthrogryposis and works in the area of health and advocacy for people with disability; and activist/model Viral Modi, who is also wheelchair-bound.

The evening saw about 200 people with and without physical challenges gather to discuss how we can make conversations easier without either putting people with disabilities on a pedestal or rendering them completely invisible.

In conversations, there is also a need to be politically correct all the time, the panelists agreed. “The path to meaningful conversation is not beating around the bush,” said Malhotra.

There is no right way to be empathetic and sensitive to people with disability, the panelists agreed, but a good way to start is to always treat someone with a physical disability as an equal.

“Awareness among caretakers is absolutely important too, to make the disabled person feel comfortable and help others make conversations with them,” Malhotra added.