What would you take with you to jail?

With going to jail having become excessively fashionable, Pagal Patrakar lists some items on your must-have list there! Check them out.

brunch Updated: Jun 02, 2011 14:27 IST
Rahul Roushan
Rahul Roushan
Hindustan Times

News reports say that DMK leader and 2G scam accused Kanimozhi has filed an application for having pen and papers in her cell in Tihar Jail so that she can write about her stay and thoughts in jail.

Now that's impressive and fills me with hope - finally we can have a book titled "Letters from a Daughter to Her Father" that was much awaited after Pandit Nehru wrote "Letters from a Father to His Daughter" while he was locked up in jail by the British rulers.

In fact, Ram Jethmalani should have argued that since Kanimozhi is a poet and writer, she should be granted bail. That appears far better that a stupid logic that Kani should be given bail as she was a woman. Ask Arundhati Roy if you don't believe me.

Nonetheless, this whole episode also made me think, rather imagine, what other leaders or celebrities will want to take with them if they were, god forbid, locked up in jail (don't take it literally and be worked up if you are a fan or follower):

Monica BediAamir Khan: Being Mister Perfectionist, I think he would want to take a mini hammer as they had shown in the movie The Shawshank Redemption and find out if a jailbreak can really be carried out with that small a tool. Hollywood better pray that he doesn't get a chance to expose them.

Shahrukh Khan: Maybe a few players of Kolkata Knight Riders, or a sharper hammer than what Aamir would take so that he ends up being number one just in case there is any race between the two.

Salman Khan: Nothing, surely not a shirt. Jail authorities will provide everything to Chulbul Pandey.

Rakhi Sawant: Right now she would just be happy to get in a jail, as she has not been in news for quite some time now. And maybe a webcam afterwards.

Ekta Kapoor: Exclusive access to the webcam of Rakhi Sawant and video editing machine to produce Rakhi MMS.

Navjot Singh Siddhu: Alistener, who will patiently listen to all his idioms and phrases.

Sreesanth: Harbhajan Singh.

Harbhajan Singh: Chris Gayle (Mumbai Indians face Bangalore in the IPL play-off next).

Amar Singh: a tape recorder and phone book of Niira Radia.

(Rahul Roushan aka Pagal Patrakar is the editor of the leading Indian news satire website Faking News. You can connect with him on Twitter and on Facebook)

First Published: May 26, 2011 16:52 IST