E-Paper
Mantra to one big happy family: Fun chats, shared meals & respect
On the eve of International Day of Families, HT reports on some of such families in the city that claim to have been living as a big unit for decades
Lucknow: In the era of nuclear families, some still believe in larger households with people from multiple generations living, surviving and thriving under one roof.
On the eve of the International Day of Families, HT reports on some of such families in the city that claim to have been living as a big unit for decades. It is love and the values of kinship that have kept them together. They are each other’s support system, in both good and bad times.
Imran Ahmad Abbasi and 35 members of his family live in the Chowk area of the city. Their mornings begin with the entire family gathering for breakfast. Fun chats give them a head start to the day.
“My grandfather Zameer Sahab and father Izhar Sahab moved here from Farrukhabad in 1908. They, later, started a perfume business, which all of us now run collectively. While living in a joint family means being surrounded by a number of people who enjoy being together, maintaining it is an uphill task. One must keep his eyes, ears and tongue in check always. When any of us decides something, all members of the family try to abide by it,” says Abbasi.
He says it was his parents who encouraged him to continue living in a joint family. “When we have our breakfasts and dinner, everybody follows a rule: no phones. All of us dedicate this time to each other. During festivals, the number of people in the house goes over 100,” he adds.
Pankaj Mehrotra, who heads a family of 35, says he is the third generation of his family, which was started by his grandfather in 1940.
“My day begins with making tea for everybody and cleaning my mother’s room. All of us divide the tasks among us. Then I spend at least an hour with my mother and aunt – both are bedridden. On Sundays, breakfast sometimes comes from our favourite snack store. All of us sit together to discuss the gossip of the week. Our only mantra to ensure togetherness is to maintain respect between the young and old. Besides, we try not to lose our temper,” adds Mehrotra.
Prabhu Jalan, whose family relocated to the city from Gorakhpur in 1934, has 30 people from three generations living under a roof.
“My elder brother Jagdish Prasad was very particular about discipline and having all of us live under one roof. He passed away a few years ago, but his vision continues to be a guiding light for all of us. Our day begins by reciting the morning prayers at 5 am. Even at leisure, we sing bhajans as many of us are fond of singing. Living together helps us in both good and bad times. Besides, all the work at home is divided to ensure that everybody gets equal responsibilities and nobody feels burdened,” says Jalan.
