Ways by which our attachment style can impact friendships

From disorganised attachment to secure attachment, here is all that you need to know how various types of attachment impact friendships.

The attachment style we have determines the way we connect in a relationship. Attachment style heavily impacts our romantic relationships. The friends we make and the way we connect with them is also ruled over by the attachment style we have. "There’s a lot of talk around attachment styles and romantic relationships— but attachment styles deeply impact how we make friends. And how we maintain (or don’t maintain) those friendships. Keep in mind attachment styles are fluid meaning we can have blended styles of attachment (see ourselves in more than one) and certain styles can come out in different relationships with different people," wrote Psychologist Nicole LePera.

Ways by which our attachment style can impact friendships (Unsplash)

The Therapist further explained how people with different attachment styles make friendships:

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Anxious attachment: People with anxious attachments can get attached to a friend very quickly. They give in to a friendship, and when they do not receive back the same amount of affection, it can impact them emotionally and mentally. They often feel that they are ignored. They also often exhibit behaviors that include wanting the friend to meet all the emotional needs or withdrawing completely from the friendship out of fear.

Avoidant attachment: People with avoidant attachment often are lone wolves, not wanting any kind of attachment or friendship. They usually have very few friends. They withdraw from showing any kind of affection in any relationship. Avoidant attachers are more prone to exhibiting ghosting behaviors.

Disorganised attachment: These kinds of people have both anxious and avoidant attachment styles making them show confused behaviors. They may trust their friend very easily, but at the same time, can feel betrayed at the slightest thing. They are not good at addressing conflicts and may often show big reactions.

Secure attachment: in this type of attachment, a person develops a healthy relationship and friendship over a period of time. They allow trust to grow naturally and check-in with friends. They provide mutual support, respect and loyalty.