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Saturday, Sep 21, 2019

Valentine’s Day 2019: To all the boys I’ve loved before and might love in the near future

This Valentine’s Day, we’re talking about being single and choosing to stay single till you find ‘the one’. There is a flipside to it too. Read on to know more.

sex-and-relationships Updated: Feb 14, 2019 13:39 IST
Saumya Sharma
Saumya Sharma
Hindustan Times, Delhi
To all the boys I’ve loved before and might love in the near future
To all the boys I’ve loved before and might love in the near future(Unsplash)
         

I’ve been single for as long as I can remember, and most of the time it was out of choice. There were boys whom I loved or was in love with, there were boys who probably felt a certain chemical reaction towards me too, but it wasn’t the right time, probably.

 

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Popular opinion about staying single might suggest otherwise though, ‘cause apparently it’s a horrible thing to put yourself before anyone else (bae, in this case, self bae). Having enjoyed years of me-time, dining alone, watching movies and plays alone and a recent development being travelling alone, it gave me a chance to know myself better. And interestingly, it’s not just me who is saying this. Unfortunately women (mostly) spend years waiting for the ‘right’ company to come along to do any of the aforementioned activities or will end up succumbing to some pressure and making a half-hearted choice because it fulfills a proverbial checkbox. The first choice usually stares back at you when you look in the mirror.

 

via GIPHY

However, here’s the flipside. Your late twenties and possibly early thirties are going to be the most trying times if you’re all about competition and being a part of the rat race that doesn’t necessarily yield the desired results. Your friends have been getting married, travelling the world with their SOs, having children, while you’re still figuring out what to wear to work tomorrow and eat that thing you read about the other day.

 

via GIPHY

Marriage doesn’t necessarily define that you’ve found The One given that, ones bank account and the supposed security that finances bring you cannot be guaranteed with just a simple and nice person’s niceties and kindness. So to all the boys whom I’ve loved/crushed on/been smitten with before, and might probably do so in the future too, it takes a while to find yourself and then someone who can complement someone, not fill the gap. For all the single ladies out there, today is just another day... don’t worry about wearing red or dressing up or spending time by yourself - if something is meant to be, it just is. Love is never about competition but there are great rewards for recognising your own mettle first.

Happy Valentine’s Day, you all!

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First Published: Feb 14, 2019 13:14 IST