Straight Talk|Parents can be friends too

I am a young man of 23. My problem is that I do not know what to make of my parents, especially my mother. She behaves more like a friend towards me than a mother. Off late, she insists that I share all my secrets and feelings with her.

I am a young man of 23. My problem is that I do not know what to make of my parents, especially my mother. She behaves more like a friend towards me than a mother. Off late, she insists that I share all my secrets and feelings with her.

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While I sincerely appreciate her efforts to try and be friendly with me, it gets very embarrassing, especially in front of my friends.

She is a wonderful mother but her being over-friendly is really throwing me off balance. How do I tell her that I want her to be more of a mother than a friend?

As you have recognised and acknowledged, your mother is only trying her best to be a good parent and creating a protective environment for you.

Sometimes, parents can be possessive and may not realise that their children need their own space when they grow up. This could at times, lead to conflict.

It seems she is persisting with her role as a doting and protecting mother, and feels that you may share more about your life with her if she can communicate with you as a friend.

You should try to respect her concerns and curiosity to know about what is happening in your life.

At the same time, you could convey to her that you respect her and she is the person to whom you will turn to for advice and support whenever you need it.

She needs to be convinced that you would make her a part of any important decisions that you take about your life and your future.

It might put some of her anxieties to rest and bring about a change in her attitude. However, words will not be enough to convince your parents, especially your mother. Your actions should reflect the fact that you are capable of making mature decisions and handling your own life in a responsible way.

(Identities have been kept confidential)