Guest Column by Sakshi Sindwani: “My voice today is stronger than all the bullies’ voices combined”

A fashion content creator talks about being more than just an advocate for body positivity and how society stereotypes people

Till now, I’ve always come under the body positivity category whether it was awards or lists in the world of fashion. It’s only this year that I was included in the main big category of fashion bloggers in a recent bloggers awards, which felt great. And that made me realise ‘hum kitna peeche hain (how far behind are we as a society) that being included in a mainstream fashion category feels like a big achievement, just because I am known for my body positive attitude and content. But, I am first, a fashionista and fashion content creator!

No poster girl goals

I don’t want to be the poster girl for body positivity though it does make me feel important in a way. But it’s too much responsibility. One person can’t make a change or lead a movement of this kind. And in any case, my cousin, who’s in school, is still facing the same kind of bullying I did.

Bullying by peers is something I kept taking for years. Comments like ‘who will marry you’ came aplenty, not just because I was plus-sized, but also because I am tall. There were also comments about my face and asymmetrical eyes, which I am still not ready to talk about. I was in my second or third year of college when I decided I had had enough of the bullying.

Today, the voice I have is stronger than all of the bullies’ voices combined. I’ve been overcompensating for all the hardships and bullies I have encountered since forever. I still remember being bullied in school. It stays relevant to me. It also acts as a constant fiery motivation for me when it comes to work.

Fake it till you make it

The best way to deal with it? When it comes to confidence, fake it till you make it. It will soon become a part of you and you’ll actually be confident. I also believe that you attract half the things happening to you via your body language, the way you talk about yourself and carry yourself.

Things are getting better, though. I just walked for the biggest designers during the recent Fashion Week. In 2019, I was the first plus-sized pool model in Fashion Week and this year, there were three such models! The inclusivity we are seeing isn’t just for the plus-sized, but also for the dark-skinned, mixed size, chest-heavy and transgender models.

Last year, when I won in the Body Positivity category in the same awards, I realised it encourages people to be comfortable in their own skin. But if a big-sized girl doing fashion won in the big fashion category in the awards, it would have made a bigger statement.

(As told to Karishma Kuenzang)

Sakshi Sindwani is a fashion and body positive content creator and model.

I Say Chaps is a guest column that allows passionate, creative people a platform to have their say.

From HT Brunch, May 28, 2022

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