HT Brunch Mental Health Cover Story: Therapy works, writes Sejal Kumar
I started uploading videos on YouTube when I was 19 years old and people have seen me grow from a bubbly kid to who I am today at 26. But many people have told me that they don’t like the new me because I’m not ‘bubbly’ anymore. Comments like this play with your head because they are about me as a person and make me scared to grow and evolve.
Content creators often suffer anxiety because based on what people say, you could literally lose a job.
When you’re younger, seeing other people getting 1k likes or followers makes you envious. At the same time, you’re told that envy is a bad thing. So, you take this conflict out on yourself because the system is designed that way. There is a video I saw recently in which someone rated the creators she met in person out of 10. It made me question why I was giving anyone the right to rate me as a person!
I have struggled with anxiety since 2016. Over the last five years, I’ve tried things like reading, being positive and meditation. Finally, five months ago, I started therapy.
Therapy is crucial, because it shows that what you’re going through is not in your imagination. This is vital, because in India, we’re encouraged to bottle up our emotions, which leads to more issues.
But therapy is expensive. Only go when you are comfortable mentally and financially. I started it late because I didn’t understand that what I was going through was crippling anxiety, and because I was saving up for it.
It’s nice to know that none of what I feel is only in my head. It feels as though you’re standing up for yourself. And you have a guide through the process.
Sejal Kumar is an Indian YouTuber since 2014 and has over 1 million subscribers. She released her first original song Aisi Hoon in the project, Creators for Change.
(As told to Karishma Kuenzang)
From HT Brunch, October 10, 2021
Follow us on twitter.com/HTBrunch
Connect with us on facebook.com/hindustantimesbrunch