Planting seeds of relationship growth: Therapist shares ideas

From stepping away from the triggers to being vulnerable, here are a few ways to plant seeds of relationship growth.

In a relationship, people undergo change with time. However, sticking by each other and prioritising the emotions and feelings that we have for each other helps in making an effort to create a healthy and safe space for growth, betterment, happiness and peace. In a relationship, equal amounts of effort, understanding, communication, loyalty and trust are needed to make things work out for the long haul. Relationship growth is also necessary – it happens over time. "Relationship growth doesn’t happen overnight…it’s a process that takes time and consistent new behaviors. You don’t need to be perfect (perfect is the enemy of growth), you just need to be consistent with new behaviors 50% to 75% of the time (maybe even less when you’re new to change)," wrote Therapist Julie Menanno.

Planting seeds of relationship growth: Therapist shares ideas (Unsplash)

But what happens when we don't get it right? The therapist added, "When you don’t get it right, step back and reflect, figure out what you can do better next time, forgive yourself, apologise if you need to, and keep moving forward. This work is about the long game. The percentage of time you try healthier behaviors will grow over time. Practice makes a habit. Trust the process and during moments when you DO get instant positive results, because those times will happen too, savor them," she added. Here are a few ideas of planting seeds of relationship growth:

Try one thing at a time: When we want to initiate changes in the relationship, we should be patient enough to try one thing at a time to not make the partner and ourselves overwhelmed.

Learn to be validating: We should be mindful to validate the emotions of the other person. This will help in creating a healthy space for us and our partner to be vulnerable.

Get vulnerable: We should also learn to be vulnerable – this will open the space for emotions and conversations.

Step out before you step in: In case of triggers, it's important to step away from the impulses and take a pause to reflect if the responses are healthy.