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Secret to instant attraction: Relationship coach reveals hack to look attractive on first date, how to use it

A relationship coach shared the one hack you need to look instantly attractive on a date. Find out how to use it when meeting someone for the first time. 

Updated on: Mar 15, 2025, 10:30:01 IST
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When we go out on a date with a potential partner, meet someone for the first time, or catch up with a crush, we want them to find us attractive. While chemistry plays a great role in the success of a relationship, the initial sparks fly when the other person feels some connection or finds it hard to look away.

This simple dating hack can help you look 10 times more attractive. (Shutterstock)
This simple dating hack can help you look 10 times more attractive. (Shutterstock)

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In an Instagram post shared on March 13, Louanne Ward, a dating expert and matchmaker, talked about a simple hack to make you look instantly attractive during any conversation. Per Louanne, most people don’t realize how small shifts in body language can completely change how they’re perceived. Per the dating coach, if you want to create effortless chemistry and attraction in real-life interactions, her hack will surely help you.

How do you look instantly attractive?

Louanne posted the hack with the caption, “Most people completely overlook one simple tweak that can make them 10x more attractive in conversations.” Per the dating coach, it’s called the ‘AT20 Eye Contact Rule’. Wondering what it is? AT20 stands for Around-the-Target 20 percent.

It means you should only maintain direct eye contact for 20 percent of the conversation while subtly shifting your gaze around their face for the rest. While doing so, you need to keep these 3 key things in mind, according to the dating expert:

1. If you stare too much, it can feel intense, creepy, or confrontational.

2. If you avoid eye contact, you appear nervous, uninterested, or lacking confidence.

3. But when you balance the eye contact with subtle shifts (to their lips, cheekbones, or forehead), it creates a sense of natural intrigue and chemistry.

How to use it on a date?

If you are wondering how to use this hack perfectly during a date, the dating coach has some advice. Per Louanne, hold direct eye contact when they’re speaking for about 20 percent of the time and let your gaze naturally shift around their face when listening. You should always avoid robotic staring and make it seem natural.

Additionally, when you look away, do it slowly and intentionally rather than darting your eyes. Lastly, mix in a brief smile or smirk when re-establishing eye contact. Per the dating expert, this triggers warmth and connection. “The result? They’ll feel an undeniable pull toward you—without even realizing why,” Louanne added in the end.

Why does it work?

1. Mystery and attraction

Eye contact helps create mystery and attraction. “Slightly breaking eye contact at key moments makes them want to pull you back in,” the dating coach explained.

2. Natural and comfortable

When you maintain eye contact with subtle breaks, it feels natural and comfortable during conversations. It prevents the awkwardness of over-staring while still keeping you engaged.

3. Mimics romantic cues

It mimics the romantic subconscious cues. For instance, our brains associate this gaze pattern with flirting, intimacy, and chemistry.

Note to readers: This article is for informational purposes only and not a substitute for professional advice.

  • Krishna Pallavi Priya
    ABOUT THE AUTHOR
    Krishna Pallavi Priya

    Krishna Priya Pallavi is a journalist with over 9 years of experience, covering health, fashion, pop culture, travel, wellness, entertainment, festivals, mental health, art, decor, fitness, and sex and relationships. She is an alumna of the Indian Institute of Mass Communication (IIMC), Dhenkanal, and holds an undergraduate degree in Journalism and Mass Communication from Guru Gobind Singh Indraprastha University, Delhi. Her strong academic foundation informs her analytical and detail-oriented approach to storytelling, helping her uncover stories where none seem to exist. Before joining Hindustan Times, Pallavi worked with some of India’s leading media organisations. She spent close to three years at India Today, where she honed her newsroom skills and developed a sharp editorial sensibility. She also worked for over a year and a half at Vagabomb, ScoopWhoop’s feminist digital platform, where she explored stories through a gender-sensitive, socially aware lens. Pallavi has a deep interest in global fashion trends and international fashion seasons, and enjoys interviewing celebrities and tracking pop culture movements—interests that frequently translate into engaging, reader-friendly stories. Alongside lifestyle and entertainment, she has a keen eye for impactful health and wellness journalism, regularly interacting with doctors, designers, and digital content creators to bring nuance and credibility to her work. Born and raised in Haryana, Pallavi remains deeply connected to her ancestral roots in Odisha. Her ability to spot fresh angles brings curiosity and depth to stories she pursues. When not chasing deadlines, she enjoys spending time with her dog, planning her next vacation, reading, running new trails, and discovering new destinations.Read More

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