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Bollywood: 2013's pop culture cheat list

In a film crazy country, enough is never enough. If you aren't done with films, here's our list of some regular ones, some offbeat.

brunch Updated: Dec 23, 2013 16:39 IST
Hindustan Times

We’re a bit of a film crazy country. And let’s face it, some of us watch a LOT of movies.

And we talk about them over and over again. But how many things can you do anyway? And what if you haven’t watched the big films?

All hell will break loose – "Yaar, woh picture kaise nahi dekhi?" – so we bring you a list of all the Bollywood films that rocked our world in 2013 (and not always in a good way!).

If you’ve missed out on any, DVD leke aao, popcorn banao aur baith jao, okay? (Alternatively, say what we tell you to say and you’ll be safe)!

Lootera and Goliyon Ki Rasleela: Ram Leela were familiar with the stories (at least all English literature students were) and we wanted to see how they would be handled. Both films got some ‘O Henry/Shakespeare must be turning in their graves’ reactions but everyone agreed, both films were a visual delight!

What to say: (For Ram Leela) Bhansali’s usage of colour and lighting is exquisite. Watching his films is such an experience!

(For Lootera) The Last Leaf was my favourite story in school/ Sonakshi has really grown as an actress. Such a mature performance.

Yeh Jawaani Hai Deewani’s the hottie, Deepika’s the nerd, things click, nothing happens. Years go by, things eventually fall into place. Essentially, it’s good-looking people travelling to good-looking places and attending good-looking shaadis...

What to say: They really shouldn’t have split up. They look so good together!
Krrish 3 entire Roshan khandaan and Priyanka Chopra were back in action in our desi caped crusader saga. Add a body suit-wearing mutant Kangana Ranaut and a kajal-eyed Vivek Oberoi and you know you have an epic film on your hands.

What to say: My kids really liked it/Only Rakesh Roshan gives Rakesh Roshan work/Can chameleons walk through walls?
Raanjhanaa love always hits dangerously close home for some folks and Raanjhanaa offered an alternative to the traditional happy ending.

What to say: Killing yourself is no answer/I hate it when people think Dhanush only sang Kolaveri Di... so stupid I say.
Shuddh Desi Romance it because it’s a brave new world where we (gasp) date people and don’t marry them (double gasp), because we do get scared in relationships.

What to say: Finally a movie on how relationships work in the real world.

Kai Po Che the one film this year that everyone liked. With a bevy of relatively unknown actors and a sensitive subject, not many were expecting much. And how wrong they were! Despite Chetan ‘messiah author of the middle class’ Bhagat’s involvement, this film was the ‘must see’ of the year!

What to say: Such good young actors Bollywood has now/ The book and the movie are so different/So many lives destroyed by the riots.
Go Goa Gone was India’s first zom-com (zombie-comedy)! With some great highly quotable one-liners and zombie film pop culture references galore, this is one absurd amusing film at its best. So hard to resist a blonde Saif going ‘I keeel dead peepal’. He keeled it with this one.

What to say: This Vir Das is so talented! We must go for his next show.
Besharam’s exactly what should’ve been said after giving the makers of said film one tight thwack. It’s not often that people walk out of a Ranbir Kapoor movie (in which he has dance numbers as well!) looking so stunned at what has just happened to them. Watch the movie. Go ahead. I dare you.

What to say: How could Ranbir do this?!/ How could his entire family do this?!/ That heroine was terrible/ Ranbir can’t pull off a Salman...woh itna Dabangg nahin hai.

Chennai Express made a movie. How could it not be big?! The great north-south divide was hotly debated. It meant that conversation in theatres often went something like this:

A: "Like this Sharook, you also think all south Indian languages sound like ende pende na?"

B: "Arre but that is what it sounds like"

A: "You north Indians...."

What to say: Repeat the conversation above/ Such a typical Rohit Shetty movie.

D-Day, The Lunchbox, Bombay Talkies, tight, interesting, well- acted... these three films are what you throw in the face of those who diss Bollywood and worship foreign cinema

What to say: "We’ve finally gone beyond such movies being classified as parallel cinema"

Bhaag Milkha Bhaag

A non-cricket sports related movie! The versatile Farhan Akhtar put on his running shoes to portray Milkha Singh and it worked! to say: We should all serve our country/ It could have been 30 mins shorter/ I don’t know why a love story was needed.

Tune in: 2013's best music

Must-hear Albums

Random Access Memories by Daft Punk:

Get Lucky is not exactly Discovery but it had some very smooth grooves.

My Soul Alone by The Chris Duarte Group:

A killer Texas blues album with some really soulful guitar work. Progressive experimentation in Carelessness.

Lucky 7 by Stupid Ditties:

This compilation comprehensively represents the indie scene across our great nation. Tremendous effort by ‘veteran scenester’ Rishu Singh!

Good Singles

Best Song Ever by One Direction:

1D had an eventful 2013: they released a movie in 2013 (colloquially referred to as 1D3D); they released an album (featuring this song); they came close to defeating Beliebers as the most hated fan club in musicdom.

Up in the Air by Thirty Seconds to Mars:

This song released in space. A disc was sent up as a payload to the NASA crew who then premiered it on NASA TV. The video is written, directed and edited by Jared Leto, and may trigger epileptic seizures. Also, it won Best Rock Video at the MTV-VMA 2013.

The Video List

Wrecking Ball by Miley Cyrus:

The album is called Bangerz. near-naked Miley tongues a sledgehammer. A fully-naked Miley rides a wrecking ball. After the kind of year she’s had, more needn’t be said to convince you to watch it.

Dented Painted Remix & The Mamta

This effort takes music to hitherto unexplored territories. Samples of speech are interwoven with dubstep loops and the result is music that you laugh with. The former stars Arnab ‘DaNationWants2kno’ Goswami with Abhijit ‘Rashtrapati-putra’ Mukherjee and the latter, Momotadidi.

Compiled by Shaoli Rudra and Shantanu Argal

From HT Brunch, December 22

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First Published: Dec 21, 2013 12:32 IST