Know your ‘isms’

Smart people will always throw big words around. Some are not quite what you think they mean

Smart people will always throw big words around. Some are not quite what you think they mean

Absolutism

What it’s not: The belief that one brand of vodka will make you smarter

What it is: Government by a single absolute ruler or authority



Adamitism

What it’s not: Stubborn love for Hannah’s no-good ex-boyfriend on Girls

What it is: Nakedness for religious reasons (Ha!)

Agathism
What it’s not: Belief that The Mousetrap is the world’s greatest play.
What it is: Using evil for the greater good

Dualism
What it’s not: Idea that two girlfriends are better than one
What it is: Idea that the universe is controlled by one good and one evil force

Emotivism
What it’s not: Reading every letter and punctuation mark as a facial feature on a smiley
What it is: Theory that moral statements are inherently biased

Holism
What it’s not: A chance to feel up girls during the festival of colour
What it is: Looking at parts of everything in relation to the whole

Minimalism
What it’s not: Wearing just your Speedo to work
What it is: Encouragement for the simplest interpretation of an idea or form

Pansexualism

What it’s not: Making out in the kitchen while the eggs are frying

What it is: The idea that all thought is derived from sexual instinct

Titanism
What it’s not: Belief that your wristwatch controls the universe
What it is: The spirit of revolt or defiance against social conventions

From HT Brunch, April 7

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