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Witerati | As G.O.A.T as it gets
As 2023 brings its share of new long lists and wishlists, some old or overused internet slangs have got into the bad books of a Michigan university. And how!
New Year rings in so many newness narratives that you have “new” jumping at you from every hashtag, status update or tweet, not always short and sweet.
New Year thus sees a mushrooming of many a long list, short list and wishlist, faster than encroachments popping up at Sarojini Nagar or Sadar.
Sample these.
*New Year resolutions’ list
*Why not to make New Year resolutions’ list.
*New words of the year that you can’t spell list.
*New words of the year that you can’t spell but autospell can help misspell list.
*New OTT dramas to binge watch in the New Year before dropping dead from Netflix fatigue list.
So on, so forth, the newness narratives unfold their drama.
In keeping with this sentiment of ‘ringing out the old, ringing in the new’, a Michigan University has gotten into the act, too.
Lake Superior State University has unveiled its list of words it deems inferior. Internet inanities that it has called for weeding out from colloquialism in 2023, for they doth stand done to death.
In the list are phrases old and new to slangs that spew, from ‘gaslighting’ and ‘moving forward’ to ‘inflection point’, ‘irregardless’ and ‘quiet quitting’.
In its axe-worthy vocabulary are also words that somehow struck such a chord that one would not like to ring in a requiem.
The curious case of dictionary de-listing for better or for curse.
Whither words’ worth
Topping this list is that strange acronym reminiscent not only of a ruminant animal species, but also a certain style of beastly bushiness of the bearded breeds among homo sapiens.
G.O.A.T. Greatest Of All Time.
How sad that barely had one’s ears gotten accustomed to this acronym when here comes a call to sound its death knell.
The whole of recent FIFA World Cup season, one could overhear animated midnight debates with phone cronies (hope not phoney’ cronies) emanating from the den of one’s offspring about goals (goals as far removed from how to ace it at BBA papers or placements, as Jhumri Telaiya is from Jhunjhunu). Every deafening great soccer debate regurgitating till late was punctuated with this acronym, mouthed with much swag “n’ swagger.
“Bhai, G.O.A.T hai... G.O.A.T”
At first, it seemed one had heard it wrong, owing perhaps to descending deafness that might be attributed to post midlife hormonal imbalances. One presumed that the jollifications pouring forth from the frenzied football fan gullet inhouse were :-
“Bhai, GOAL hai ... GOAL.”
By the time enlightenment dawned that it had to do not with goatee or goal, but with Messi Vs Maradona history-scripting quotients, soccer season was over and done with.
Ah, but the 2022 long list of slang with swag was not yet done.
As was evident from the not-too-greatest-of-all-time FIFA fallouts.
Another phrase, that did not find much favour in the Lake Superior University List for 2023, now manifested itself.
An email landed soon about the offspring’s attendance deficit, consequent to and subsequent to soccer season.
When the matter was gingerly broached with one’s progeny, for cultivating corrective demeanour such as burning midnight oil more over marketing gyaan than Mbappe dhyaan, pat did one’s progeny spout another overused phrase that did not make the grade to the Lake Superior State University’s good books.
The curious case of “It is what it is”.
