Women have a lot to learn when it comes to investing in themselves

When it comes to taking decisions concerning self development, career growth or upgrade of skills, women often tend to procrastinate.

I love the winters and the festivities. The Christmas season fills the air with hope and positivity.

While choosing work-life balance, women often tend to worry about the household in their absence. Men don’t. (HT File / Representational Photo)

Before going for the holidays, we are now working on our next quarter’s events and workshops. That also means meeting a lot of resourceful people. One observation that most business and lifestyle coaches shared with me was that women hesitate to pull the trigger when it comes to investing in themselves, or their careers to be more specific.

Although women show a lot of interest in the programme contents, but it feels like there is a huge barrier to overcome before they can actually pay up and enrol for the program. Men make quicker decisions. And this trend holds good for any major expense that concerns self-development or career improvement or upgrade of skills.

I have been in that space myself. The biggest worry for me used to be: If I have to commit that many hours, who will take care of the house? Until finally, one day, I had to be at a summit where I was a panelist – it got delayed and I had to stay longer. On my journey back home, I probably used up all of my creativity in drawing up various scenarios on how things could have gone wrong without me being there. And of course, I returned to a house that was perfectly fine. Well okay, not the way I would like it but everyone was alive and nobody was complaining.

I must mention that I had a slight inkling that they probably enjoyed me being away.

The next worry usually is: Is the programme or investment worth it? Maybe I can do this or that with that money. But why doesn’t your career or work deserve this investment? Always remember, it is only when you take your business seriously, everyone around you takes it seriously.

One of the most convenient excuses that I used to give was: Maybe not this time, will do the next one. But I have now trained myself to ask, “If not now, when?” No more procrastination and waiting for the right time. Now is the right time to get better and grow in our careers.

A bigger issue is that most of us always want to check with someone before we decide. We wait for approval before we take a decision for our own betterment.

We unfortunately have been conditioned to wait for others to do us good. When we know something is good and want to take action, we wait for that validation. And when such an opportunity presents itself to men, they simply grab it, as they should. Even if it doesn’t come their way easily, they demand or go looking for it. In my opinion, this amount of aggression is required to move ahead.

Recently, I rented out seats at a co-working space. It has helped me focus better, get more work done and we feel the progress. I delayed this decision for a while. I am unsure if I was scared of making a commitment or looking at it as an expense or a benefit that can be postponed.

The decision has done great things not only to the venture but also to my self confidence. No more bhaiyya asking me what to cook for lunch or didi asking me, “Where is Surf? Need to reorder Lysol!” I am able to switch off and concentrate.

I am in a beautiful space where everyone is also working, and the positive vibes just rub off. And guess what, the house is also perfectly fine without me being at home between 9 am and 4:30 pm. This is the biggest Christmas gift I could have given myself.

What are you gifting yourself this Christmas? Psst! Don’t wait for Santa.

(An advocate of women’s rights, Neela Kaushik started a Facebook community called Gurgaon Moms to create a local support network for mothers in the city. Today, it has more than 25,000 members.)