'Kamasutra still relevant'

Pornography was there, is here and will remain. If a man is sexually educated, pornography can work as a psychological aphrodisiac as it arouses people.

Mobile porn is a big nowadays. What does it say about Indian society?
Pornography was there, is here and will remain. If a man is sexually educated, pornography can work as a psychological aphrodisiac as it arouses people. I have come across several couples who have seen a porn film or read an erotic passage aloud, just to arouse themselves. And it works.

So mobile sex is a good?
The problem is we don’t have a proper sexual education. Suppose a man sees somebody with a 9” penis in a video and if he doesn’t know what is normal, he might get an inferiority complex. He should have the knowledge that the sexually active part of a vagina is the outer two inches.

How did we end up being such a repressed society?
Sex is not taught properly. It is considered a taboo. Now people have become more aware. When I opened the sexual clinic at KEM hospital, in the beginning no woman came to see me. But now, a woman will come and say, ‘Doc, you better treat my husband, otherwise, I am walking out of the marriage? These things were unheard of before.

How did this change come about?
Through the media. Then we have held conferences. In 1994, we submitted the draft proposal of National Sexuality and Health Education programme. So we took sex from the drawing room to Parliament.

How good are Indians in bed?
It used to be said that most Indian men used their wife as sleeping pills. But the pattern is changing. Now the wife is more demanding and the man has more knowledge. Nowadays, a man tries to satisfy his wife. And as Vatsayana said, if you are unable to satisfy your wife normally, you can try masturbation, oral sex or use an artificial penis.

Is this something like a dildo?
Yes. Made of ivory, lead, copper, etc. Vatsayana also suggested life-size dolls for males. Though Kamasutra is ancient, it is still modern.

Have extramarital affairs gone up?
Affairs which were hidden earlier are now coming to the surface. I don’t like the word ‘extra’. It is a demeaning term. That person just becomes an object. And you just satiate your desire.

Can you give some practical tips on how to be a good lover?
Devote more time to foreplay. The four-letter word is: T A L K. The most important thing is communication. Express your likes and dislikes before, during and after love-making. Satisfaction is more important, not sex, per se. Unless you give, you cannot get.