E-Paper
Luv in d age of SMS (again)
Anyone who has seen David Beckham on television will know that that the only thing worse than having to read his grammatically-challenged text messages is having to listen to his high-pitched voice.
What kind of man makes love by SMS? A semi-literate footballer, that's who.
Anyone who has seen David Beckham on television will know that a) he's thick as two short planks and b) that the only thing worse than having to read his grammatically-challenged text messages is having to listen to his high-pitched voice. Even so, and regardless of what one thinks of Mr Beckham's intellectual prowess, it is hard not to feel sorry for the poor fellow: a lonely, young man tempted by streams of seductresses; a celebrity entrapped in an age where women kiss and tell — if the money is good enough.
Yet, oddly enough, he might have got away with everything — including even the three-in-a-bed romps that have so tickled the British tabloids — if he hadn't been stupid enough to send explicit responses to the SMS messages that his girlfriends sent him. It is these messages that are now being used as proof of his infidelity. Without the text-messages, it would have been the word of a British national hero against that of a succession of sex-crazed, money-mad scrubbers.
The rise in text-messaging has seen the emergence of a new kind of sexually voracious woman. While there is no doubt that the SMS phenomenon has empowered a whole generation of otherwise timid girls, it has also allowed a more devious kind of woman to carry on simultaneous textual flirtations with dozens of men while still pretending to be virginal or faithful to her husband. Should any man make the mistake of replying to these intimate and inviting messages, this kind of woman then proceeds with the affair and saves the messages for future reference — unless, of course, her husband or her jealous lover intercepts the messages and hunts down her boyfriends.
The lesson, in this era of sexually voracious women and gossip-hungry societies, is simply: do not respond to such text messages. Who knows how much trouble it could get you into?
