One of those dreams
I realised later that the time the dream had occurred, my husband (then beau) was being resuscitated at the hospital; they had almost lost him.Updated: Oct 23, 2003 22:48 IST
This is not a fictional account. I might have to change the names of people that I make a mention of just in case they desire it to be so. Rest all is true but there is obviously no way that I can prove that to you. The only motive behind writing this is to share with anyone (who is just as inclined towards) the little discoveries that I make in my attempt to see that which is not tangible but more real than what is. I really do look forward to hearing from whosoever wishes to write back to me about one's own feelings on the 'subject'. The link for writing back is given right below my own account. I hope to write to you every Wednesday and Saturday.
Have you guys ever had dreams that were trying to tell you something? I have had a few of them and I would share one of them with you today. Those days I was a college student and was spending my Dussehra vacations at my mama's (maternal uncle) place in Dehradun. My husband (who is from Dun) and I were seeing each other then.
One night I dreamt that I was lying on a hospital bed and a nurse was drawing out large amounts of blood from my body and I was wondering as to why was she doing that. After sometime I almost got restless in my dream because I felt that at the rate the woman was drawing the blood out, I would soon collapse and in that desperate state of anxiety I got up from my sleep. I realised that not only was I sweating but I was also feeling extremely weak, as if someone had actually sucked the blood out of me. I noticed the time; it was somewhere around four-thirty in the morning. Something didn't feel right, and I had this huge urge to call up my beau's house but obviously I couldn't have done so that time in the morning. I tried to sleep off but couldn't; I was extremely restless and I waited for the clock to reach a respectable time for me to call.
I finally called at seven in the morning. An unfamiliar voice spoke at the other end. "May I talk to aunty please? This is Megha," was all I said. I felt that it wouldn't be right to ask for him so early in the morning. "I am sorry but nobody from the Bist family is here. Their younger son had a terrible accident late at night and they are all at the hospital," the voice informed me. I was shaking like a leaf when I put the phone down.
I realised later that the time the dream had occurred, my husband (then beau) was being resuscitated at the hospital; they had almost lost him. But that was not it. Later that evening, my mama's daughter, who I am extremely close to, called from Bombay (her husband was posted there then) to talk to me.
"Megha, is everything fine with you?" she sounded very worried.
"Why do you ask?" I questioned her instead.
"I had this dream tonight. You and I were going somewhere and there by the roadside I saw peer baba's dargah. I don't know why but I had a very strong feeling that you needed to pray. I asked you to go there and pay your obeisance and strangely you accepted my request, which is so unlike you. You went, prayed while I waited for you outside. So after waking up I was kind of concerned; just wanted to make sure if everything is fine… was wondering why would you have needed the prayers."
I was deeply touched… it was a nice feelingto remember how we are all connected to people we really care for. And not only was I feeling secure in that feeling, I was also wondering about my relationship with my husband-to-be... could I, could my prayers have played a part in bringing him back to life? Too presumptuous of me I suppose but well, that is exactly what I had thought and I might as well be honest about it.
Anyway, I don't know what role have I played in my husband's life but the role he has played in mine is invaluable, it is irrevocably precious for it was he who brought home the book 'Autobiography of a Yogi' by Paramahansa Yogananda.
No doubt Swami Chetananda's book 'God lived with them' had filled me with intense spiritual ardour but for some reason there was still an uncanny distance between that world and me... I was more in awe of it than in love with it. The book definitely planted in my conscious-self the seed of love for the Divine in the form of the Universal Mother but obviously a seed needs constant nurturing to grow into a tree. The seed lay there waiting for the right time probably and when the hour arrived, my husband brought home the Book.
If 'God lived with them' gave me the necessary push, 'Autobiography of a Yogi' had me sailing smoothly and more confidently towards my Home.
More about it the next time - October 25th, 2003. Hey, it's Diwali that day! A lot of festivity in the air here in Delhi ... I wonder how it is where each one of you is ... my warm greetings to you all.
First Published: Oct 22, 2003 19:01 IST