How to express what you need from a partner; expert offers tips

Published on Jun 12, 2022 02:30 PM IST

Nedra Glover Tawwab, Therapist, NYT Bestselling Author, Relationship & Boundaries Expert in her recent Instagram post wrote on how to ask for what you need from a partner.

We all may have many expectations from our partners without realising they may not be in a position to fulfill them(Pexels)
We all may have many expectations from our partners without realising they may not be in a position to fulfill them(Pexels)

A good communication is an important part of a relationship and the lack of it can create misunderstandings and build up resentment. Making assumptions instead of seeking clarification is a sign of an unhealthy relationship and may not promote a healthy bond between couples. Focussing on solutions instead of problems and a resolve to be with each other despite challenges can go a long way in strengthening a relationship. We all may have many expectations from our partners without realising they may not be in a position to fulfill them. It's true that we may at times fail to look at the bigger picture and by making a mountain out of a molehill, we ruin the foundation of positivity that defined our relationship. (Also read: Are you in a long distance relationship? Here's how to keep that spark alive)

Many couples bicker over small things like laundry, cooking, babysitting and not giving each other space to be themselves. However, relationship experts say these things can be managed with proper communication and coordination. If you are too overwhelmed by work, for instance, instead of expecting your partner to read your mind, you can try expressing your need.

Nedra Glover Tawwab, Therapist, NYT Bestselling Author, Relationship & Boundaries Expert in her recent Instagram post wrote on how to ask for what you need from a partner.

"I need you to plan and prepare dinner today."

"I am washing the laundry; I need you to fold two loads."

"We argue a lot about money. Perhaps, we need to talk to a professional to get some perspective on what's best."

"Please take the kids to another area while I prepare dinner."

"It's been a busy week for me, and I need some time to myself Friday evening."

"I feel most comfortable when we have our own space. I'd like us to get a hotel when we visit family."

"It doesn't seem like either of us has time to clean the house. We need to consider looking for a housekeeper."

"I need a night away to rest and reset."

By creating healthy boundaries and voicing your needs, you are more likely to find solutions to a problem and in long run, it will only make your relationship better than ever.

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