Ways to respond when you don't want to answer a personal question

From setting boundaries to changing the subject to pointing out the discomfort, here are a few ways to avoid answering personal questions that you are not comfortable with.

In relationships or otherwise, getting bombarded with questions which you may not be comfortable answering to, can get on the nerves, while staying out of such situations or saying that it is none of their business can help, often it may come off as rude. In case we want to maintain a stable relationship with the people, all the while setting a boundary on the personal space, here are a few tips which may come handy in such situations. Addressing the same, Psychotherapist Emily H Sanders wrote, “It can be tough to know how to respond to prying questions from over-involved family members, gossipy coworkers, or prying neighbors. While you’re welcome to whip out none of your business, here are a few ways to consider responding to questions that make you uncomfortable. Take what works for you, use your own wording, or build off of them.”

Ways to respond when you don't want to answer a personal question (Unsplash)

Emily further reminded her Instagram followers that it is always the tone that matters in the words we speak - “Those who are currently working on setting and upholding boundaries may find saying these to be scary- and maybe even mean! Remember tone matters- it can soften anything. (A few of the responses here have variations that soften them slightly.) However, you want to be firm and clear enough that you’re not indirectly inviting someone to continue to push.”

Emotional energy: When attacked with personal questions, we can always say that we respect their concern, however we do not have the emotional energy to explain things. Maybe someday later would be a good time to discuss this.

Don’t talk about it: in case you do not want to talk about it at all, it is better to clearly state the same.

Dodge: You can always say that the question is very articulated, and you wish you had the apt answer for it, however you do not.

Change the subject: In case such private questions raise anxiety in you, you can always set the boundary on this.

Filtering: Some conversations are meant to be discussed with your therapist or the people you absolutely trust. If the person asking the question is not from that list, you can always point that out.

Refuse: Ask to never bring the question if it borders on comfort or mental health.

Boundary: Choosing to keep something private is an individual choice and should be respected by everyone.