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Is it a case of premature escalation?

Texting too much in the run-up to first date can set you up for disappointment.

sex and relationships Updated: Jan 13, 2014 17:44 IST
premature escalation,too much texting,relationship

Neha and Amit met briefly at a pub. They were there with friends and only managed to exchange numbers. Next day, they started texting each other and agreed to meet over the weekend.

In the next two days, Amit impressed Neha with his quick wit and pithy one-liners over the texts. They even exchanged selfies. However, it all went south once they met.

"He was nothing like what he appeared when we were texting. In fact, we had nothing to talk about," confides Neha.

She might not know it but Neha is a victim of premature escalation. "It's a trend we've coined 'premature escalation,' " Emily Morse, a sex and relationship expert, says to NY Post. "Since our whole world is so instant now, people can craft entire personas through their slew of texts .?.?. by the time you meet your partner for an actual date, you've built up this whole image and fantasy in your head of who you think they are, and then they turn out to be totally different."

In a July study titled 'Mobile's Impact on Dating and Relationships' commissioned by online dating sites JDate and Christian Mingle, more than 60% of single people said they communicate more frequently with potential dates because of their phones. But experts say that even though it may seem like you're getting to know the person better before your date, it's actually a false sense of intimacy - and you're setting yourself up for disappointment.

First Published: Jan 13, 2014 17:41 IST