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Dutch woman picks Bengaluru over Mumbai, says 'ultimate dream city became a nightmare’
Ivana shared her experience, explaining how motherhood completely changed the way she experienced the city she had always wanted to live in.
A Dutch travel influencer who has been living in India for nearly 9 years has caught the internet's attention after revealing why she preferred Bengaluru over Mumbai after becoming a mother.
Ivana, who is currently based in Mumbai, shared her experience in an Instagram video, explaining how motherhood completely changed the way she experienced the city she had always wanted to live in. "Isn't it weird how motherhood can turn certain dreams into a nightmare? For years, Mumbai was my ultimate dream city. But the day I actually moved here, I just wanted to go straight back to Bangalore," she said in the Instagram video.
Ivana recalled that Bengaluru had become her home in India. "It was slow, it was green, and it allowed me to grow in a way I felt safe," she said. However, she added that moving to Mumbai marked a dramatic shift.
"Mumbai doesn't do slow. The very same fast pace that the young explorer in me used to crave suddenly felt like constant panic mode. I was stepping into motherhood, craving a soft, slow life, and instead, I was slapped in the face with the Mumbai heat and a relentless hustler mentality," she said.
Ivana also revealed that the move coincided with serious health complications during pregnancy. Instead of exploring her dream city, she shared that she was dealing with placenta bleeding and severe anaemia while adjusting to a much smaller apartment.
"I went from a massive, breezy home in Bangalore to a tiny apartment that felt suffocating. And instead of exploring my dream city, I was dealing with a placenta bleeding and severe anaemia. I had zero energy to step out, zero capacity to make new friends, and the isolation was terrifying," she said, adding, “I felt so ashamed to admit I didn't love the dream I fought for.”
(Also Read: Dutch woman living in Mumbai compares raising kids in India vs Netherlands, lists 7 key differences)
'I felt guilty for not loving the dream'
In the caption of her post, Ivana further said Bengaluru had given her "a slow, green, spacious routine that felt like a warm blanket," but Mumbai's fast-paced lifestyle became overwhelming at a time when she needed calm and stability.
She also spoke about the guilt of not enjoying a dream she had worked towards. "I think as women, we can have this immense guilt when we don't immediately bloom where we are planted. We feel like we aren't allowed to look at a dream we actively chased and say, 'I don't think I want this right now,'" she wrote.
She added that she spent a long time denying her feelings because she believed moving to Mumbai was supposed to be her dream. "It was very hard for me to not feel ungrateful. So for the longest time I denied my own feelings, because 'this was the dream right?' Well, who's ever gotten away with that before running into a big wall of despair?" she wrote.
Reflecting on the experience, Ivana concluded that a place can be wonderful and still not be the right fit for a particular stage of life.
"The truth is, a place can be incredible and it can still be the absolutely wrong place for the version of you that exists right now," she said in the clip. She also revealed that amid the emotional and physical challenges of the move, she and her partner had to legally tie the knot, adding another major life event to an already overwhelming period.
HT.com has reached out to Ivana. The article will be updated once a response is received.
