Man divorces wife after dispute over child’s surname, court grants custody to mother
A man in Shanghai divorced his wife after she insisted that their son take her surname instead of his. The court ruled in favour of the mother.
A surname dispute between a couple in Shanghai, China, led to their divorce, sparking widespread debate on social media over traditional naming customs, reported the South China Morning Post.
The couple, identified by their surnames Shao and Ji, had a daughter in 2019 who took Shao’s surname, while their son, born in 2021, was given Ji’s surname. Shao repeatedly urged Ji to change their son’s surname to his, but she refused. Their disagreement eventually led to their separation and divorce in 2023.
Following their split, both children stayed with Ji. Shao sought custody of their daughter while relinquishing his claim over their son. However, Ji insisted on keeping both children. The matter was taken to court, where Ji was granted full custody, as she had been their primary carer for years.
Chinese courts prioritise the “best interests of the child” in custody cases, typically favouring mothers unless the father can prove he is better suited to provide care and support. Shao, unhappy with the ruling, appealed to a higher court but was denied again. He was ordered to pay child support until the children turn 18.
Internet reacts
The case triggered strong reactions online. One user supported the court’s decision, calling Shao “stingy” for divorcing his wife over a minor issue. Another commented, “Does it matter whose surname the children take? Nothing matters more than a harmonious relationship for couples.” A third person said, “He was not the one who was pregnant for 10 months and delivered the baby. He should be thankful that one of them takes his surname.”
In some wealthier regions like the Yangtze River Delta, families with only daughters have introduced an alternative marriage model known as “two-headed marriage,” or liang tou hun. In this arrangement, women do not accept a bride price—often seen as a transactional practice—and agree to have two children, with one taking the father’s surname and the other the mother’s.