Game of Thrones episode 9 spoiler-free review: Battle of the Bastards

The action is believable, the fighting makes you tense and if you still didn’t feel squeamish, there is enough classic GoT style gore and violence to make sure you do.

Every year we wait for the ninth and penultimate episode of Game of Thrones (GoT) and the show always one-ups the massive hype. This time, the episode gave the world one of the most brilliantly made war scenes in movie or television history and also perhaps one of the best episodes of the entire series.

The action is believable, the fighting makes you tense and if you still didn’t feel squeamish, there is enough classic GoT style gore and violence to make sure you do. (HBO)

Fans cried and cursed the makers for cutting costs on a slew of fight scenes through the season but you will not hear anyone complain now. The scale of the battle is massive and the CGI, if used, merges seamlessly with the scenes. The action is believable, the fighting makes you tense and if you still didn’t feel squeamish, there is enough classic GoT style gore and violence to make sure you do.

This isn’t to say the episode was flawless though.

Even the nervousness before the battle is addressed in the episode. (HBO)

Unlike what you would have expected from the episode preview, we do not stay in Winterfell the entire 70 minutes. We are also taken to Mereen where, as you might remember from the last episode, the slave masters are attacking the city. In case it wasn’t too clear from the little glimpse in the last minutes of No One (episode 8), this episode shows it in full scale: The shoddy computer graphics.

From fire balls being lobbed at the pyramid to the sea to the sky, everything looked exceptionally fake. And it isn’t very easy to forget because the events at Mereen are mighty important and deserve better CGI treatment. Though I can’t tell you what eventually happens (without spoiling things, of course), be rest assured, it is mighty satisfactory.

Read: Game of Thrones episode 8 spoiler-free review- No One

Unfortunately, given the robust GoT fan theory forums, the events that unfold in Mereen and Winterfell do so just as expected. So no surprises here.

The characters we expected to die do, and they do in the exact same way we expected them to. You could say that’s unlike GoT to be so predictable, but isn’t that what has happened through this entire season?

Jon came back to life as fans prayed for him to, the Hound came back like fans hoped, and Arya killed the Waif like fans wanted. This episode also aims to please, and does it well enough, so it doesn’t look lazy.

Apart from being incredibly satisfying, The Battle of Bastards also assures us of who runs the world… Girls.

Girl power on the rise. (HBO)

Daenerys already had the Essos part of the world covered, thanks to her three dragons and her own fierce Targaryen blood. Yara is on her way to rule the Iron Islands seeking Dany’s help, and Sansa, well, you’ll know when you see the episode.

The GoT men, as they stand, are more or less playing aid to more powerful women: Tyrion to Daenerys, Theon to Yara, Jaime to Cersei, and Jon to Sansa. And Arya, well she is on her own… unless she runs into the Hound again.

It seems to us, and we are pretty sure, Game of Thrones is #TeamHillary.

The author tweets as @soumya1405