Esha Deol Takhtani: In India, fathers should be proud to take paternity leave

Actor-dancer Esha Deol Takhtani on why she chose to write about her experiences of motherhood in her debut book.

It is said that motherhood is one of the most blissful phases in a woman’s life. It comes as no surprise, then, that this is what Esha Deol Takhtani chose to write about in her first book. With this, she joins the bandwagon of Bollywood actor-turned-authors such as Soha Ali Khan and Twinkle Khanna.

Esha Deol Takhtani makes her debut as an author with Amma Mia.

Read: Esha Deol reveals why she named her daughters Miraya and Radhya

Ask what was the driving factor behind penning down her experience in the form of a book and she’s quick to say, “It came straight from the heart. Whatever I was feeling at that time, I wanted to share it. I had a thought that there must be more women who are going through the same thing like me, and if I am finding solutions to the surprises coming my way, I want to share it and be of some help.”

In the age of social media, the mother of two thought of going old school and collating her thoughts on paper. But, one may be surprised to know that writing a book was never on her mind, initially. “When Radhya was transitioning from milk to liquid and slowly solid food, there were a lot of recipes that we put together. I thought, since I am putting in so much effort, I want to give it to other mothers so they have it ready for their kids. It was never about a book, initially. I was talking to a friend of mine and we thought the best way to share it would be a book,” says the 38-year-old, who shares two daughters – Radhya and Miraya – with her businessman husband Bharat Takhtani.

Titled Amma Mia, the book, which is expected to hit stands later this month, encapsulates stories, recipes and little anecdotes of experiences Esha went through during pregnancy and after giving birth. One can also absorb words of wisdom from a host of experts in the field, including pediatricians, nannies, and mothers, including her own — veteran actor and politician Hema Malini. The Dhoom (2004) actor shares, “The book has a lot about me, my childhood and early years…There’s a lot about what goes down in South Indian households. Through this book, I feel a lot of people who don’t know me will get to know me (laughs).”

What’s more, the book also gives an insight into the varied perspectives of mothers, both working and non-working. “There’s a chapter where we’ve got working mothers and homemakers to talk, that’s a very interesting chapter. It shows a vast difference between the thought processes of both. As working mothers, we want something that we can put together quickly that turns out to be good. This book has a lot of simple yet enjoyable recipes with ingredients that are readily available,” reveals Esha, adding that the book also talks of post partum depression and provides answers to some commonly-asked questions to pediatricians. “I think if I can get over certain things, everyone can. A lot of girls tend to give up hope. But the breakthrough moment is what’s important. It’s (the book) on motherhood and the journey you go through before you welcome your first child.”

While the role of a mother is indubitable, the father, too, has a role to play. With such busy schedules, how does the couple manage to chalk out time for the family? Esha says, “There are times I need to go out of town or for a shoot. Bharat, too, travels for work. But I make sure one of us is always with the kids. That’s something we balance out as a couple.”

With a number of countries introducing the concept of paternity leaves, does Esha, then, feel the need for this to be introduced back home? “It’s a sweet concept and should be encouraged,” she continues, “But then, it depends on the father’s job. Also, he should be comfortable and proud in taking paternity leave. I feel in India, fathers are a little taken aback and ask ‘why should I take a leave’. It’s slowly coming here I feel, the trend. Undoubtedly, the woman is not alone (during pregnancy). She has her family with her and an arsenal of help at home. But her partner’s support matters, and him being there is very important.”

Author tweets @srinidhi_gk

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