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Out of the box and into the frying pan
Innovative thinking should be encouraged, but sometimes it can also get you into trouble
Difficult times and desperate situations are a perfect breeding ground for out-of-the-box suggestions. Success may not be guaranteed, but the excitement generated by such suggestions is worth the effort. Covid-19 has created unprecedented uncertainty across the globe. Even as the number of infected patients and fatalities rises globally, brainstorming to tackle the virus and life to return to normalcy assumes high priority. Scientists across the world are trying to piece together the jigsaw puzzle amidst numerous out-of-the box suggestions put forth by those who have no expertise on the matter – the latest one suggesting that a disinfectant be injected in the human body to kill the virus takes the cake.
This takes me back to my days in the Army and the perils of out-of-the-box thinking. Years ago, the general officer commanding (GOC) was scheduled to visit our unit. The criticality of the first visit by this no-nonsense boss was lost on no one, in line with the age old dictum, ‘first impression is the last impression’. Now, there was a tricky problem here. The unit, even the neighboring area housing other units, had a number of stray dogs. Generous feeding by our God-fearing troops, despite orders to the contrary, had the canine population multiply in recent times. The commanding officer (CO) was in a dilemma, wondering how to escort the GOC around the unit lines with our four-legged friends merrily making hay.
Having failed to find a solution after a couple of brainstorming sessions with the senior lot, the second-in-command suggested a chat with the young officers to get some innovative ideas. Various suggestions came up. Sandy, the young captain, too came to life and said, “Sir, we shall organise a food fair for our dog population at a secluded corner behind the alpha squadron cookhouse. All of them will gorge on their favorite food and thus remain confined to one spot while the GOC takes a round of the unit lines.” There was silence before the CO exclaimed in utter glee, “So it shall happen... Proud of you, my boy!”
Everybody, of course, concurred and Sandy was the hero, having guaranteed himself a full 60 days of annual leave and a definite fillip to his career.
Well, the day arrived and it was confirmed to the Tiger that the plan was in place and the unit was spick and span and canine free. The GOC arrived and after the mandatory operational briefing, the CO proudly offered him a tour around the unit area. However, the moment the open jeep with the VIP driven by the beaming CO turned the corner, a cavalcade of stray dogs of all sizes and shapes blocked the advance of the inspecting team. An obviously shaken CO was quick to rise to the occasion, a hallmark of a seasoned soldier, and with a matter-of-fact, say-it-all smile, stopped the jeep to let the column of animals pass. The smile directed towards the general meant, “ Sir, the unit respects animal rights as much as human rights.”
The GOC, confronted with an awkward situation, could do nothing but respond: “Colonel, hope sterilisation norms are being followed with these poor things?”
The unflappable demeanour of the CO, though, saved the day for the unit but had young Sandy marching up to the second in command. After a five-minute dressing down, he was asked if he wanted to say something in his defence.
Sandy’s reply was: “Sir, the plan was perfect, only if the cook had not used aromatic spices. Also, mother nature controlled the wind direction, which forced the dogs, even those from the neighbouring units, to make a beeline for the food fair,” a response more convincing than the one presented after the disinfectant ingestion faux pas. Meanwhile, presence of mind exhibited by Sandy made him a favourite of the boss in all future brainstorming sessions for his out-of-the box thinking.
avnishrms59@gmail.com
(The writer is a Chandigarh-based freelance contributor)
