Guest Column: When parents effectively channel their kids’ talents

Perhaps, it is high time we as parents made our children derive happiness and satisfaction in activities they enjoy

Managing the pressures of life is not a walk in the park for today’s youngsters. No sooner do they pass their Class 9 exams than over-ambitious and overbearing parents, reminiscent of Gradgrind from Charles Dicken’s “Hard Times” — fixated on facts and practicality, pounce on their children’s evolving imaginative and emotional life, suffocating their free-flowing thoughts by mentally conditioning them to join coaching classes for cracking the medical and engineering tests.

The education system should encourage creativity, rather than homogenising students into a standardised mould. (Getty Images)

Nevertheless, reality TV shows continue to provide a breath of fresh air in our lives. Here, youngsters, hailing from diverse social backgrounds, are held together by the glue of musical and dancing talent. Being selected for the show is the trampoline they need to elevate their musical careers to more respectable or higher levels. These music and dance reality shows are a crucible for young talents, where individuals undergo intense and life-altering experiences that mould and refine them. Here, no contestant feels inferior to another, simply because they discover a sense of unity through their shared passion for singing and dancing. Both boys and girls among these contestants exude camaraderie and a “joie de vivre” on the show, solidifying the belief that no Damocles’ sword of parental tyranny hangs over their lives.They are free to pursue the career of their choice, regardless of how challenging or demanding it might be. Reality shows offer participants a level playing field as they feel liberated from the pressures of joining the rat race for jobs and striving to enhance their social status.

These talented young singers and dancers dedicate a lot of time to practising their craft (doing “riyaz” for singing and cueing the moves to test their dance moves) for hours on end, but nevertheless enjoy every moment of it. The exercise never becomes monotonous or stifling to their creative spirit unlike the endless grind of coaching classes. These singers and dancers might also be students of engineering or medicine, yet their parents are remarkably flexible and open-minded, allowing their children the freedom to follow their passions. We need more parents who can understand their children’s emotions and ambitions, effectively channelling their talents accordingly. American psychologist and author Timothy Leary once said, “If you find yourself feeling like an outsider, like you don’t fit in with the crowd, that’s a good thing. That means you have the potential to make a real difference in the world.’’

In another reality show, a dance group of boys comprising participants from ordinary families spoke about how they initially encountered staunch resistance when their parents deemed the idea of rehearsing for a reality show repugnant. The parents believed the effort was not worthwhile and that their focus should be elsewhere. By their own admission, these youngsters’ minds were initially a cul-de-sac of thoughts, with no clear path to resolution. However, the boys persevered and continued their pursuit.They won everyone’s heart with their flawless performance on the show. Their parents, who were present during the performance, expressed happiness witnessing their children’s achievements.

Perhaps, it is high time we as parents made our children derive happiness and satisfaction in activities they enjoy. The kaleidoscopic nature of their existence would help them explore diverse experiences and to embrace novelty, helping them to lead meaningful lives. The education system should encourage creativity, rather than homogenising students into a standardised mould. In the book “The Parent’s Tao Te Ching”, American author William Martin has an important message for parents: “Do not ask your children to strive for extraordinary lives…Help them instead to find the wonder and the marvel of an ordinary life…Make the ordinary come alive for them. The extraordinary will take care of itself.”

mukherjee.dashing@gmail.com

(The writer is a Delhi-based freelance contributor.)