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Shaheen Bhatt: Of cats & dogs and some self-reflection
What’s the best way to get a cat and dog to get used to each other and coexist? And can finding common ground with your mom help improve your closeness?
Pet problems
I moved in with my boyfriend but his cats terrorised my poor dog, and I had to move out. How do we move back together again?
—GS, Mumbai
Both dogs and cats can be very sensitive to change as well as fiercely territorial. So anytime you introduce a new animal to a pre-existing household, there is likely to be some tension.
It’s important to introduce animals to each other slowly and at their own pace.
Animal behaviourists specialise in helping you train, socialise and introduce new animals to one another, so before you begin the process of moving back in it’s worth consulting a behaviourist who can guide and help you figure out how to make this transition as smooth as possible for everyone.
Self-reflection
I love both my parents, but I love my mother a little less than I do my dad. In fact, I’d pick my husband and sister before my mum. Am I a bad daughter?
—Anandita, Via email
Love is love. If you love someone, you love them. And you love your mother. But loving someone and feeling close to them can sometimes be different things.
Feeling close to someone depends on a lot of things – how well you communicate, how much you have in common, how much time you spend together, etc.
It is more likely that you have a better understanding with your father, husband and sister and so you gravitate first to them. This does not make you a bad daughter. Perhaps finding more common ground with your mother will help improve your closeness.
Shaheen Bhatt’s public outing of her own challenges with mental health fuelled discourse about a relatively ignored topic, and made her a role model for young girls to look up to
From HT Brunch, January 31, 2021
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