Confidence is the key to happiness. Here are key tips to build and sustain confidence levels

ByZarafshan Shiraz, Delhi
Sep 10, 2022 04:28 PM IST

A self confident vibe attracts the respect and recognition externally. Confidence is one of the most important factors in personal success but it can be tricky to build. While there are no easy answers or magic formulas for developing confidence, here are some simple ways that you can do so

In this day and age, confidence is a valuable asset as with confidence we can speak to anyone, we can communicate not just with words but with our whole persona and there is a sense of satisfaction when we are confident. We feel happy about our achievements and willing to explore more in life.

Confidence is the key to happiness. Here are key tips to build and sustain confidence levels (Image by Gerd Altmann from Pixabay )
Confidence is the key to happiness. Here are key tips to build and sustain confidence levels (Image by Gerd Altmann from Pixabay )

A person is truly happy when they feel accomplished, loved and heard for exactly who they are and all this can be achieved if you have self confidence. If you know you can make it anywhere, you will make it anywhere and confidence is one of the most important factors in personal success but it can be tricky to build.

While there are no easy answers or magic formulas for developing confidence, there are some simple ways that you can increase your chances for success and happiness by working on your strengths and making small consistent gains but why is it that our confidence levels fluctuate? In an interview with HT Lifestyle, Shobha Nihalani, multi-genre author, ghost-writer and mindset coach, answered, “Have you noticed how children are always bubbling with confidence? So we can assume that we are born confident. As we grow up, we lose confidence as a result of bad experiences, lack of adequate encouragement, childhood conditioning and even rejection.”

She added, “As we continue through life, we find many opportunities to regain confidence. However, as we lose that inner ability to see ourselves as capable and skillful, we tend to avoid challenges. We tend to feel we are not good enough. When we pursue a goal and fail we get even more discouraged. Failures are part of the process of discovering our potential, and offers us a lesson to do better next time. To be consistently confident requires some conscious effort. The world is not going to offer praise and appreciation, one needs to first find it within oneself. This confident vibe then attracts the respect and recognition externally. So, it is important to start from within, train the mindset to focus on positives rather than negatives.”

She suggested the following key tips to sustain confidence levels:

1. Social media scrolling - Often when we look at other people’s posts, we lose our sense of confidence. We tend to compare ourselves with others and we end up with the feeling that there’s something lacking in our lives. Create a ‘bank’ of achievements. When you are feeling low, refer to this bank and recognize your strengths. Make a list.

2. Facing failure - We fail and that is part of life. Avoiding failure has become a habit because we feel embarrassed or uncomfortable that we failed. There is no one who can claim that they have never failed in life. Once we accept that failure is part of the learning curve, we can look towards new goals and learn from past failures. Successful people fail and that gives them the understanding to improve. If your past failure is still bothering you, write it down on a piece of paper and then tear it up and throw it away or burn it. This is a ‘letting go’ act.

3. Saying “no” - When we passively allow others to make decisions for us, we become frustrated and angry internally. Brought up to please, we find it difficult to say “no” to other people’s requests. Confidence also means being assertive enough to say no. Before you say “yes” on auto-mode, pause and think. Are you saying “yes” because you really want to or are you being a people-pleaser? When you are not keen to do something, say “no” firmly and politely. If you are uncomfortable saying a straight “no” then try these: “I will let you know later” or “I need time to consider…”, “Let me think about it…”. Don’t feel bad saying “no”, it is not the person you are rejecting, it is their request and if you say no to others, you are saying yes to yourself. A great confident boost there!

According to Ayushi Mathur, Confidence and Motivation Coach, Global Entrepreneur, Personal Branding Expert, Influencer and Podcaster, confidence can be built with a lot of hard work and it’s never too late to start by using certain tips. She said, “You can start building your confidence today. Don't expect miracles overnight; like anything else worth having in life, it takes time and patience on your part before you'll see any real results but as long as you keep up with these ideas regularly (and continue practising them), you'll find yourself feeling more confident and content in no time at all!”

She recommended some tips to build and sustain confidence that include:

1. To build long-term confidence, you need to make small, consistent gains - You can do this by setting short-term goals and then working toward them over time. For example, if you want to lose 10 pounds by summer, set a goal of losing half a pound per week for six weeks (and don't worry about how much weight you actually lose; that's not important). After those six weeks have passed and your progress has been evaluated by a professional or a friend who knows what they're looking at when assessing your body composition (i.e., muscle mass), then it's time to consider whether the goal was reached successfully enough to warrant celebrating with a celebratory meal!

2. Build confidence by working on your strengths, not on your weaknesses - When you're trying to get your confidence on track, it's important not to focus on your weaknesses. This can be tough because we all have them—but it's also the key to building sustainable confidence. You want people around you who believe in you and support your goals. Focus on what makes YOU happy and confident, rather than comparing yourself with others' lives or accomplishments (which will only make things worse).

2. Build confidence by developing new skills and abilities - Learning new skills and abilities can be a great way to build confidence. Here are some examples:

a) You could learn how to play an instrument or sing, which will help you feel confident about your ability as well as make others around you more comfortable with this activity.

b) If you want to travel the world but don't have the money for a massive flight budget, maybe learning how to speak Spanish would be a good start! It doesn't have any real value in terms of making money (at least not yet) but it does give us something positive on our resume when applying for jobs elsewhere.

3. Build confidence by getting feedback from someone who likes you - If you want to build confidence, the best way to do it is to get feedback from someone who likes you. This person should be someone who has a good understanding of your strengths and weaknesses and is willing to tell you what they think so that you can improve on both. The key here is being specific about what exactly needs improving: “I need some help with this part of my presentation” instead of “I’m not sure how I feel about this topic yet” will give your listener more accurate information about where they can help out most effectively! Asking for honest feedback will also help keep their eyes focused on helping rather than making excuses for why no one else has ever done anything like this before (which means less pressure).

4. Build confidence by identifying and expressing gratitude for your accomplishments - When you express gratitude, you're focusing on the positive instead of dwelling on what's going wrong. The more grateful you are for your accomplishments, the better able to see past obstacles and focus on what's working already. This helps build your confidence because it gives you something positive to look forward to in life—and that can be a powerful tool for boosting happiness!

5. Make a lasting impression with the perception of success - Confidence also comes from knowing what works for you: if someone else has a different approach based on their own experiences—and it works better for them—that's okay! The important thing is having an understanding of how your body and mind work so that when faced with any kind of challenge (whether it's social situations or work environments),you know exactly where there are strengths within yourself which can be used as tools against those challenges instead of letting them weigh down on us like rocks falling into our lives every day.

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