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Emotional stages we go through after a breakup or loss
From shock and denial to forgiveness, here are seven emotional stages that a person goes through after a breakup or a loss.
A breakup or a loss can be difficult for everyone. The journey of going through it and the way of healing is different for each person. "Going through a breakup can be very difficult and stressful, and there's no one way you're supposed to feel about it. Often, you are filled with many confusing emotions at once, and you may wonder if what you're feeling is normal. For a while, you might even become overwhelmed with emotions, it's normal to feel this way. It's quite a process to 'let go' of a person you really loved or the reality you thought existed. Your mind has to re-adjust to a new way of being without this person in your life," wrote Therapist Lalitaa Suglani.
Lalitaa further explained the stages that a person goes through in a breakup or a loss:
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Shock and denial: The first stage of a loss in being in shock and not understanding completely if things have really happened. We constantly keep checking our phones and inbox to see if we have received a text. The shock of things happening can be difficult for us to deal with.
Desperate need for answers: From questioning ourselves to the entire relationship where we have invested our emotions, we desperately seek answers for the queries. We also look out for a healthy closure.
Fear, loneliness and sadness: The third stage is having the fear of being alone, being stuck in loneliness and experiencing immense sadness of the loss.
Bargaining: This is when we start to conjure up scenarios in the mind to postpone the sadness. The temporary bargaining with ourselves may work at times but we go back to the same place yet again.
Anger: When we feel betrayed and left behind, we start to be angry at the person for doing this to us. We start to calculate the emotions, affections and love that we invested in them.
Peace and acceptance: This is the stage when we start to heal and put ourselves ahead of others. We start to accept things as they are and prioritise our peace.
Forgiveness: This is when we forgive the other person, our younger version and move on from things with kindness.
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