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Is your relationship based on love or loneliness? Find out with these questions

Oct 16, 2023 05:49 PM IST

From self esteem to future plans, here are some important questions to determine if your relationship is motivated by love or loneliness.

Exploring the intricacies of human connection, this question delves into a fundamental aspect of relationships: their underlying motivation. Is your relationship with someone motivated by genuine emotional connection, deep affection and shared interests, or is it the result of your need for companionship and loneliness? Love and fear of loneliness can sometimes blur the lines between the two. Moreover, it can be quite difficult to determine the real reason for staying in a relationship that is no longer healthy. You should take the time to evaluate your relationship and decide whether it is based on love or loneliness. If you discover that your relationship is based on loneliness, it is important to take steps to resolve this situation before it's too late. (Also read: Small things that improve relationship health)

In the complex landscape of human relationships, understanding the fundamental underpinnings of your romantic partnership is crucial for its health and longevity.(Freepik)
In the complex landscape of human relationships, understanding the fundamental underpinnings of your romantic partnership is crucial for its health and longevity.(Freepik)

Is It Love or Loneliness? Ask Yourself These Questions

Clinton Power, Relationship Counsellor and Marriage Therapist shared in his recent Instagram post a few important questions that can help you decide whether the foundation of your relationship is love or loneliness.

Why are you together?

Love: You genuinely enjoy each other's company, support each other's dreams, and have a strong emotional connection.

Loneliness: You're scared of being alone and feel incomplete when you're not in a relationship.

How do you feel when you're apart?

Love: Sure, you miss your partner, but you're comfortable and secure when you're on your own.

Loneliness: You feel anxious, empty, and lost when your partner is not around.

How do you handle conflicts?

Love: You face conflicts head-on with a healthy attitude, trying to understand your partner's point of view and finding a solution together.

Loneliness: You avoid conflicts like the plague because you're terrified it might lead to a breakup, which means being alone again.

What about your friends?

Love: You keep a healthy balance between your relationship and your friendships.

Loneliness: Your friends hardly see you anymore because your relationship consumes all your attention.

How's your self-esteem?

Love: Your self-esteem is rock solid, independent of your relationship. You feel good about yourself, single or taken.

Loneliness: Your self-esteem is a roller coaster ride, heavily tied to your relationship status. You only feel good about yourself when you're with someone.

What are your future plans?

Love: You envision a future with your partner, but you also have your own goals and aspirations.

Loneliness: Your future is a bit blurry, and your plans mostly revolve around your partner.

Do you feel fulfilled?

Love: You feel content and happy in the relationship, and you also find fulfilment in other aspects of your life.

Loneliness: Fulfilment only comes when you're with your partner, and there's a void when you're alone.

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