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Extra-sensory perceptions

Mamatadi can spot a Maoist a mile away. Surely this ability can be put to good use for national security.

india Updated: Aug 15, 2012 22:33 IST
Hindustan Times

The Oxford English Dictionary defines 'paranoia' as a 'mental condition characterised by delusions of persecution, unwarranted jealousy, or exaggerated self-importance, typically worked into an organised system'. If we use this definition to classify Indian politicians, then there are many who would fall in that category.

But West Bengal chief minister Mamata Banerjee is a cut above the rest. From arresting a university professor and his neighbour for circulating cartoons critical of her to walking out of a television programme in a huff because she didn't like certain questions from the audience to the latest one, arresting a farmer for questioning her, Didi has become the epitome of touchiness. At a rally in the Maoist stronghold Belpahari, Didi singled out a farmer for questioning her and branded him a Maoist. The same had happened to the professor and his neighbour as well as the young student at the studio: they had all had been termed Maoists. It seems her touchiness has even rubbed off on her ministers, one of them saw an assassination plot behind the farmer's questioning. And, when the State Human Rights Commission imposed a fine of Rs. 1 lakh on the state government for the cartoon row, Ms Banerjee thundered that even court verdicts can be purchased these days. Given the lightening speed at which Ms Banerjee is labeling everyone a Maoist, there will be few left standing without taint.

However, the central government can use Ms Banerjee's special powers to look for and mark out Maoists in a crowd. For example, they could deploy her in the Maoist-hit areas before a rally or a visit by top leaders. Didi can go to the designated area, scan the crowd and then weed out members of the Red Army. In due course of time, she will definitely improve her abilities and can be sent to other countries to help them single out people with subversive ideologies. Then slowly but surely, her flunkeys will also learn the tricks of the trade and in no time, we will have a mini-army of such special people. Just think how much we would save on security by just investing in our beloved Didi.

First Published: Aug 15, 2012 22:31 IST