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Nothing beats a NICE ‘hello’

I’m no love-guru, but there’s one thing I can say with certainty: girls are more intelligent and hard-to-get than we think, writes Rannvijay.

india Updated: Feb 23, 2009 16:50 IST
Hindustan Times

It’s a new week and the only way I can begin is by going back to the last one. The overwhelming response I got for “What’s with the F word” just proved that it’s something that the youth relate to in a split second — and I assure you that everything I write will give those in or just out of college something to think about.

At the risk of sounding conceited, I admit that back in college, I had my share of female fan following — maybe there’s something about basketball players, maybe not. All I’m saying is, from having my jersey stolen while we were practising, to being ‘the guy with that hot bike’, I was fortunate enough when it came to matters of…er…love. But then, I’ve always thought it’s not what you do, but what you DON’T, that matters when it comes to clicking with the opposite sex. This brings us to this week’s column, where I’ll talk about the eternal icebreaker, which more often than not, does the complete opposite — pick-up lines.

I still remember the first time I heard one, when my friend, on a visit to McDonald’s out of nowhere said to a girl seated right next to us, “You must be in the wrong place — the Miss Universe contest is over there.” Evidently pleased with himself, he didn’t expect what was coming next. She turned, looked at him and said casually, “You must be in the wrong place — the biggest loser contest is over there.” That’s when I knew that pick-up lines were a big no-no, and that they always sound better in your head than out loud.

I’m no love-guru, but there’s one thing I can say with certainty: girls are more intelligent and hard-to-get than we think. And in case you’re thinking a tacky one-liner will floor her, I suggest you go with an L-guard.

So my advice this week — whether it’s something like, “You must be really tired, you’ve been running through my mind all day” or “Your body is a wonderland and I want to be Alice” — there’s nothing that matches the impressiveness of a nice ‘hello.’

And in case you still feel compelled to use one, I recommend going up to her and saying, “I don’t have a pick-up line for you.”

Write to me at

First Published: Feb 23, 2009 16:45 IST