Star struck

Hallelujah! The ?messiah? has finally descended on earth. And She is a girl. The wise guys know what we?re talking about.

Hallelujah! The ‘messiah’ has finally descended on earth. And She is a girl. The wise guys know what we’re talking about. They’ve been following the star(s) for the last nine months from Hollywood to their dream chateau in Normandy and sundry goodwill trips around the world to finally reach Namibia. In this place, Baby Shiloh (the name means ‘he who is to be sent’ in Hebrew) was born to the heavenly couple Angelina Jolie and Brad Pitt not in a manger, but at least surrounded by lions to protect her from the dare-devil army of paparazzi.

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For you know, there was a prophecy told to us by an ultrasound report that emerged mysteriously on the Internet a few months ago; and the world has been eagerly waiting and watching with folded hands since for it to come true. Praise be to the UNHCR goodwill ambassador for delivering unto us another celebrity baby girl without a regular Christian name. Why a male name for a female is a conundrum you can answer if you can explain why Nouvel means ‘new’ or ‘modern’.

But celebrity watchers need not stop speculating now that the un-immaculate conception of Shiloh Nouvel Pitt-Jolie has borne fruit. Will the famous Mr and Mrs Smith finally adopt these oh-so-ordinary matrimonial titles? Till they do, we still have something to look forward to in the Jolie-Pitt-Aniston love triangle. And if they do get married, well, there’s always Paris Hilton to go back to.