HT Brunch I Say, Chaps: “The whole burden of morality is always on women,” writes Neha Bhasin

The singer who got trolled about her song on trolls, on how shaming women must stop based on appearances and their wardrobes!

Women are made to feel a certain way in society since the time she’s a child – not to wear certain kinds of clothes, be back home in time, etc. The whole burden of morality is always on women, be it at school, the society we live in, and even in the house!

When I entered the industry, I was asked to dumb down the glamour quotient. Audiences too rejected me, slut shamed and tagged me. Thing is, people see a woman in a certain way. You have to be a Sati Savitri. It has nothing to do with your actions but the way you speak and dress. Maa, beti, behen (mother, daughter, sister) – those are the only roles women have. My Kehnde Rehnde video called out the façade of the society while wearing the clothes that slut shame us. It’s in sync with the irony of the society.

Speak my mind

Not just men, women are quite bitchy online too. When I cut my short hair, people called me ‘uncle’. In India, lambe baalon se hi aap sundar hote ho (you’re only beautiful if you have long hair). I’ve developed a bit of a thick skin now. I’ve just become more unabashed and lost more followers. I also quit Twitter for a bit, too, because I was done with the negativity and am now wary on Instagram. But none of my work comes from there as I’m not an influencer or blogger. I’d rather have loyal fans than deal with muck.

Neha says her song Kehnde Rehnde (still alongside above) is about the shaming that women have to face

Haters gonna hate

It’s also fun to see trolls write rubbish as it makes it clearer that my song (Kehnde Rehnde) is for them. Aag toh usi ko lagegi jiske andar chingaari hai (only those who have hatred will be incited)? And it motivates me. I’ve been trolled enough and my job isn’t to express via social media but art. So, I wrote about something that has been ruining my self-confidence and even made me question myself. And a lot of people feel that way.

My plea to women is this: Let go of that ‘aurat hi aurat ki dushmann hoti hai’ (women pull each other down). It’s time our generation changes that. Be supportive and be less judgemental because we’ve all done things we aren’t proud of.

Neha Bhasin is a pop and playback singer who made her debut as a part of girl pop group Viva in 2002.

As told to Karishma Kuenzang

Follow @kkuenzang on on Twitter and Instagram

From HT Brunch, March 28, 2021

Follow us on twitter.com/HTBrunch

Connect with us on facebook.com/hindustantimesbrunch