Passions: The Friends debate

Does this show from the ‘90s still hold up or should they have yelled ‘pivot’? Two fans debate it out

“Every clique in each generation can relate to the show”

Friends co-creator Marta Kauffman announced $4 million to support scholars studying Africa and the African diaspora, stating she was embarassed at the lack of diversity in the show

Priya says the show addressed fertility issues, co-parenting single fathers, lesbian couples, and trans families

By Priya Chaudhary

I binge-watched the entire season of Friends in one week during my first year of college. For a generation that is all about moving to a different city to carve their own identity, this show about six 20-somethings stumbling in New York strikes a chord. Whether it is Monica’s OCD or Ross and Rachel’s constant on-and-off love life, Phoebe’s quirky lifestyle, or Joey and Chandler’s bromance, I think every clique in every generation can find something that sticks.

There are also three different paths to motherhood shown for all three female protagonists: being a surrogate for your brother and his wife, adopting twins, or being a single mother. These are things our society is still struggling to come to terms with. From fertility issues to co-parenting single fathers, lesbian couples, and trans families, plenty of things still make sense.

Friends has always come through when I am in the darkest pits of adulting. With only a few close friends around the globe, the show has been a saviour and a warm hug on nights when I just want to shrink inwards. This is what that makes it relatable even today.

Priya Chaudhary, 26, is a full-time social media manager and a part-time geek obsessed with books, sitcoms and making Reels.

“The show was neither inclusive nor diverse”

By Soham Mukherjee

Soham says there were a lot of jokes about the LGBTQA+ community: Chandler’s jokes about his dad who transitioned & the fuss Ross made over a male babysitter

Friends established a generational and nostalgic checkpoint in TV space. I have fond memories during my childhood and adolescence of watching the show with my uncle who, interestingly, found Joey and Monica equally relatable.

Marta Kauffman, one of the show’s co-creators, regrets the unconscious lack of diversity in the show, claiming that today they would possibly do things differently, and that it was a ‘product of the times.’ One may offer Marta a different reprieve: the depictions of gay marriage, casual sex, Christo-Jewish cross sectionalism and other themes uncommon in the ‘90s were a television first. However, there were a lot of jokes about the LGBTQA+ community: Chandler’s jokes about his father who transitioned, Ross’ discomfort at his son playing with a Barbie, and the fuss Ross made over a male babysitter. Then there were the jokes about Monica’s weight.

Decades ago, it was only natural that no show would or could match Nielsen’s demographic metrics identically to showcase perfect inclusivity. Societal cross sections have been fluid since then, especially in the light of the broad-spectrum organisation and acceptance of racial and gendered identity.

Friends was neither inclusive nor diverse. It was however ahead of its time—at the time.

Soham Mukherjee, 32, is the head of technology at Aetos Digilog and a somewhat Friends fan.

From HT Brunch, July 23, 2022

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