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Indian woman reveals why her family returned to India after 13 years in US: ‘You don’t really belong here’
A woman shared five reasons her family decided to leave the US and return to India after 13 years.
A woman who spent 13 years in the United States has opened up about her family’s decision to return to India, explaining that the move was not driven by visa troubles, loneliness or a lack of community. Instead, she said changing priorities, ageing parents, children, work-life balance and immigration-related pressures eventually convinced the family to start over in India.
(Also read: NRI woman explains why she returned to India after 17 years in the US: ‘Reality hit me…’)
Why the family decided to return
Taking to Instagram, Pankhuri shared a video reflecting on the decision, which she said was made in 2023.
“So, why did we move back to India after spending 13 years in the US?” she began, adding that her family had “no visa issues” and enjoyed an “amazing community and friendship” in America. “But something was missing,” she said.
One of the biggest factors, according to her, was a sense of belonging. She recalled routinely having to spell out her name and explain aspects of her identity and culture. “It's really about being around people who have the same cultural references as you, so you don't end up explaining yourself all the time,” she said.
Ageing parents and children shaped the decision
The second major reason was being closer to ageing parents. Pankhuri said living oceans away felt increasingly difficult as time passed. “And then I really started asking myself a question, like, how much of their time do I want to spend on FaceTime or WhatsApp video calls?”
Her children were another important consideration. The couple began thinking more deeply about the childhood they wanted for them, including their everyday lives and relationships with family and friends.
Pankhuri also spoke about the strain of managing demanding jobs and household responsibilities in the US. “Both me and my husband, we were working 7:00 AM to 9:00 PM every day, like clockwork,” she said, adding that access to domestic help in India was another factor behind their decision.
‘Our priorities in life have changed’
She further pointed to “constant immigration pressure”, saying the family had repeatedly planned aspects of their lives around visa appointments, restrictions and immigration procedures.
“To wrap this up, our priorities in life have changed from when we were 25,” she said. “And I think that's really something that nobody will tell you, which is you can spend years building a life that you might not even want.”
She added that returning was only the beginning: “Moving is one big decision, but building a completely new life, that's a completely new challenge.”
Watch the clip here:
Social media users react
The post drew several reactions from viewers who related to her perspective. One user wrote, “Family and belonging matter more with time.” Another said, “This is such a thoughtful perspective.” A third commented, “Moving back is not an easy decision.” Another user added, “Building a new life again takes courage.”
(Also read: Hyderabad woman returns home after 5 years in US, shares ‘reverse culture shock’: ‘I’m not exactly same person’)
HT.com has reached out to the user for her comments, and the copy will be updated once her response is received.
(Disclaimer: This report is based on user-generated content from social media. HT.com has not independently verified the claims and does not endorse them.)
