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Confessions: Safety over style
I brought out my winter wardrobe a tad too early this year—just last week, when I was to go to Gurugram
I brought out my winter wardrobe a tad too early this year—just last week, when I was to go to Gurugram. Given that I was in the middle of moving houses, the only ‘shrug’ I had to throw on top of my comfy but above-my-knees sleeveless black dress was a thicker variant than I would have liked.
Art of accessorising
But this is an accessory that belongs on my safety list of things I mentally tick off when I’m commuting just 40 minutes to Gurugram. Another essential is my pepper spray, of course. And shoes I can run in (never heels), though I will be in an Uber. All this because it’s better to avoid the possibility of harassment in the streets (and have to use the pepper spray), than actually be harassed, no?
Women are always told ‘don’t be a hassle’ anyway. But women also prefer to be safe, not sorry. I can’t count the number of times I pulled on extra layers of clothes the minute I drove out of South Delhi. Who’ll take a risk when the judicial system forgives sexual assaulters because “the woman wore ‘sexually provocative dresses’,” like a Kerala court did recently?
Noida, too, is in the category of places where I consider what I’m wearing. Six years ago, as I hailed an auto outside the Botanical Garden Metro Station, a man came up to me and randomly gave me a rape threat. I was too shocked to react but I remember regretting wearing my comfy tights and T-shirt. After that, I never went to Noida in anything that didn’t make me look like a sack.
Mapping Delhi
In old Delhi, I was told by a tea-selling lady that I should go home because it was dusk and I was wearing jeans. So, I wore kurtas on future visits. In West and East Delhi, I’ve not attempted to even opt for pairing stockings with dresses, forget a LBD.
There’s an even shorter list of areas where I am okay wearing a crop top. And they’re all in South Delhi, before dusk. I always research the bar or restaurant I’m headed to before I decide what to wear. Same for music festivals. Same for a ladies’ night—there are more men on the prowl than on any other night.
That safety layer of clothing is now a mandate. Because this is the only way I can wear what I want in a time when society, politics, courts and men across the world are all trying to shape women’s wardrobes.
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From HT Brunch, December 3, 2022
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