Pet owner guilt: Why do pet parents feel guilty about not doing enough for their companions, how to get over it
Pet owner guilt is real and could be affecting your mental well-being. Here's what you should do.
If you are a pet parent and often struggle to strike a balance between work, life family and your beloved pet, the guilt that you feel is quite real and could be affecting your mental well-being. Be it feeling guilty for not taking your dog to walk every day or leaving your cat alone at home as you head to office, pet owner guilt much like mom's guilt can be tricky to tackle especially because your animal companions can't exactly tell you how they feel. Seeing them sad or inactive may make you feel it's all your fault. (Also read: How to provide best nutrition to your beloved pets; a complete wellness guide for pet parents)
Psychology Today mentions a 2022 study led by Dr Lori Kogan at Colorado State University that studied pet-related guilt in detail and was published in the journal Animals. The research team recruited 592 American dog owners through a commercial source of research subjects. The participants, who were divided roughly into equal numbers of men and women, completed a series of scales and questionnaires. In addition, they answered questions about their attachment to their dogs and how they dealt with their dog-related guilt.
The result of the study suggested that dog owners’ guilt can be compared to parental guilt reported in human family studies. The study also added that the relationship between dog owners’ guilt and discrepancy between their actual and ideal self, in regard to the role of a dog owner, also mirrored human-only family research. The study suggested advised that companies and communities acknowledge pet owner guilt and help owners find practical solutions.
The study mentions increasing schedule flexibility, psychoeducation about the detrimental aspects of guilt, and validation of the owners’ guilt experiences through support groups and individual therapy.
According to Psychology Today, most of the participants in this study admitted changing their ways of thinking about pets to help them cope with dog-related guilt while half of them said they didn't attend a social event as it made them feel guilty leaving their pet. A third of them admitted that, because of guilt, they spent time with their dog at the expense of other family members. 3 of 4 said they reminded themselves their dog has a good life. 40 percent were simply resigned to feeling guilty about living with a dog.
How pet owner guilt can be taken care of
The study suggests the following solutions:
- Schedule flexibility
- Psychoeducation about the detrimental aspects of guilt
- Validation of the owners’ guilt experiences through support groups and individual therapy.
- Many people find it helpful to tell their pets what it is they feel guilty about and to ask their pets for forgiveness.